Possession [s.m]

43.

Pillow Talk - Zayn

Earned it - The Weeknd

•rebecca•

Today is my visit with Shawn. The new revelation about me, well us, still messes with my head but I have to tell him today.

Maybe his reaction will help me decide what I want to do, but no matter what, the choice is mine. Shawn made it known to me that he does not want kids, but then told me he didn't know what he was thinking. So right now, his reaction can not be predicted.

I'll have to tell him I'm pregnant while he is in an orange jumpsuit, surrounded by a dozens other people in prison.

Maybe my decision should be made from that alone.

I have five minutes until I am to go visit him, so I'll take this time to work myself up to telling him.

When I get into the prison, I take off my coat and leave it at the entrance before signing in, get patted down and telling them I'm going to visit Shawn.

An officer then leads me towards the visiting room,  but I grow suspicious when it's not the same way as the last time I visited.

"Um. . Where are we going?" I ask the officer, but he doesn't answer me at all.

I hear faint noises of men shouting and look back at the source. About ten inmates are at a glass door, angrily shouting at me. It must have been a while since they have seen a woman in this place.

Vomit rises up my throat as one man thrusts his hips towards me, hitting the door. Another kisses the glass door while looking at me. Most of them just shout profanities at me, mixed with sexual harassment but one of them just stares hard at me. His gaze is so strong and terrifying, that every ounce of my body wants to look away but I physically can't.

My eyes drift to the Bull's eye tattoo that's kind of fainting due to his dark skin before I break the gaze and jog towards the officer.

This place scares me so fucking much. Every time I come here, something always happens. Wether it's an inmate practically ripping off my clothes with his eyes or an uncomfortable and invasive pat-down by an officer.

The officer leads me to a small room with one bed in the corner, as well as a small window.

"Wait in here."

"Why? What is this room—" Before I can finish my sentence, the officer grabs my arm and pushes me in it.

I know better than to strike back at an officer, so I just stand in here like I was told.

It's quite cold in here, and the bed seems like it has been washed so I sit down on it. Ten minutes go by, and I'm getting pretty scared that maybe I'm not here to see Shawn.

Shawn has only been here for one month, so conjugal visits are prohibited because they're allowed after three months.

I shouldn't have let that officer bring me here.

I get up to stare at the window, because the nature always seems to calm me. Unfortunately, all I see is the prison yard with men tiredly working.