Psycho But Not Really

p s y c h o - 15

"Ma'am, would you like to buy, that album?, it's the last one" the cashier asked me, knocking me out of my trance, the music was still playing, I looked at the young man, and shook my head.

"No, it wouldn't do me any good" I smiled, the cashier held his hands up and shrugged, I continued to look at vinyls and CDs, finding Marcls and I's, favourite movie, Detectives, we used to watch it every night, when the footballs games were on at school. I grabbed the case, and pulled out my wallet, only having five dollars left, I looked at the cashier, it costed twenty dollars.

He was playing, Space Invader on the old, bulky computer, I looked back at the CD case in my hand, and sighed.

It would be wrong to steal it.

I walked up to him, "Is there by any chance, you would sell this for a lower price?" I asked, the young boy, who had long hair, lazy eyes, and a skinny body form, he scoffed, "I'll sell it for, four dollars, it's an old movies anyways" he said, I handed him my five dollar note, and got my change. I walked out of the store, reminiscing over the times I had been with Marcl.

By the time I got back home, the snow had already caked the roads, and roofs of houses, I shivered as I rubbed my arms, unlocking the door and getting in. The silence hit me, I never knew that silence could be a fear, and I hated it. I walked to my room, knowing my mother wasn't coming home, I wanted to call the hospital so bad, to see if my mother was doing alright.

I walked to my cupboard, and took out all my art supplies, and canvases, I painted on, my breath hitched, and tears threatened to spill, when all of a sudden, my phone rang. Nate <3 popped up in my screen. I sighed, and rolled my eyes, without thinking I threw my phone on the bed.

I walked back to my painting, and got a pair of scissors, I did the worst thing I could've done.

I started to stab the paintings, grunting at every thrust and stab I did, sobbing, my head became a blur, "stupid! Stupid Thea, can't do anything right! Everything has to go wrong for you" I screamed. Ruining all my art, I slumped back onto the floor.

Taking in what just happened, my hands immediately cover my mouth, "no, no, no!" I whisper, crawling to the canvases, and grazing my finger tips, on the damaged rips, and tears I created. I started to ball my eyes out, my hopes and dreams in that one box, was now crushed. It felt like I had a switch in my body, that changed me, I pulled myself up from the floor, and knocked down everything thing in my room.

I slid the books off my shelves, I threw the pencils and pens around, I messed up my perfectly fitted bedsheets, and I managed to break my family photo frame. With every damage I made, there was a crash, or shatter, and scream. I collapsed on my knees, and my hands sinking into the broken glass, but not enough to cut my skin, not even wincing at the pain, I deserved.

I heard my front door open, I remember not locking it, too fixated with the concern in my body. Heavy and worrying footsteps made it up to my room.

"Thea? What the hell happened" Nate, he had came?

How? And why?

I looked up, scowling, and getting up, "why are you here" my voice was deep, Nate took careful steps towards me, looking around, seeing my books and papers everywhere .

"Why are you here!" I yelled, Nate gulped, "you answered the phone, and I heard you screaming, so I came, okay?" He said, holding up his hands in defence, I raised my eyebrows, "I didn't, pick up" I whispered, I walked towards my bed, and sat down. Gripping my hair, I felt a hand in my back, I flinched, "hey, it's okay, you're stressed, but going to this extent was too much" Nate whispered.

I sobbed into my hands, "I couldn't d-do anything, why me?!" I yelled, but Nate cooed, and rubbed my back. I somehow always find myself with Nate in these scenarios, it's like he knew, every time life had to hit me hard. Nate slowly laid down, pulling me on to his chest, I sniffed and closed my eyes. I found comfort in Nate's warmth, and his steady breathing.

I felt my body slide off of his chest, and felt the same, familiar empty, cold space beside me, I was too tired to notice, but I saw shadows bending down, to pick things up. My eyes fully closed, and sleep consumed my body.

I was a mess. An ugly one too.

Once again the warmth came back, and I was covered by a blanket, and cuddled up beside Nate. I could've sworn I felt something sharp against my neck.

During my sleep, I experienced many things, one; the best nap I've ever had, two; being able to not worry about a thing, and three; having Nate beside me the whole time. I wanted to thank him so much for being with me. Nate was only a year old than me, and he knew so much about comforting a girl, I could feel my body heating, just by thinking about how protective he would be over me.

Nate Jondus, is something out of this universe. Past the stars, planets and milky ways.

Nate Jondus, is my fallen star, from another dimension.

So different, but yet he fitted in.

Nate Jondus.

•••

Cute ending, to this chapter.