Until you came (Zarry) /English Version

52. The value of the words

Ben Winston

Less than five minutes ago I met Harry Styles and I have to say he looks stunning. What a lucky man I am. I've read all his books and they inspire me, just like him.

I've never had the pleasure of meeting him in person before. When Horan advertised the job one day, I applied in the same second, without even thinking about whether it would interest me at all, because Harry Styles was the only motivation for me. This was the chance for me to finally meet the man of my dreams and perhaps work with him. And now it's time. This is the fulfilment of my ambitions.

As he sat shyly and completely beside himself in Niall's office, repeatedly running his fingers through his wild curls, I would have loved to have given a shriek of delight. How can anyone look so incredibly good and be so smart at the same time? Harry Styles is young, a shy guy and very intelligent. This is the perfect man I've been looking for forever. Of course, I know that he is taken and spends his life with a pretty blonde. But I also know - from a reliable sources - that he's bisexual. So my odds are pretty high.

At the first meeting, however, I didn't want to come straight to the point and reveal that I' m fascinated by him. In the next few days I will first read his current work, deal with it seriously and then make a personal appointment with Harry. I want to know everything about him; the way he lives, what he appreciates, who his friends are and so on. When I have all this information about him, I'll sound out my chances of getting him. I am trying to chat Harry up.

I got time and I don't have to rush into anything.

But one thing I'm pretty sure of: The beautiful author would be perfect at my side.

Harry

Am I wrong, or was my new editor trying to flirt with me? The looks he gave me, his gestures, embarrassed me so much that I could hardly look him in the face. Somehow the situation reminded me of my first encounter with Zayn. This is exactly how our love affair began when we were invited to dinner at the Maliks for the first time.

My beautiful painter tried deliberately to embarrass me and even enjoyed it. In NiaIls office nothing else happened today. This Mr. Winston is admittedly a very attractive man, but nothing compared to Zayn. Even the thought of him gives me goose bumps. Mr. Malik has taken my heart by storm and now it belongs to him. Even Ben Winston's beautiful face doesn't change that.

Fortunately, nobody knows about my love affair with him - except Niall and he's not really interested, as long as it doesn't harm the publishing house. Taylor brought him a video of Zayn and me. Only God knows what sexual moments Louis has recorded of us. This footage no longer exists, Niall has destroyed it, but despite everything, caution is clearly called for. If I want to keep my job, I can't break up with Taylor. I've been lying to myself about Zayn and me. Now all I have to do is figure out how to break it to Zayn as gently as possible. He'll be furious if I back out at the last moment. With Taylor, I would have managed somehow, but with the Publishing House? No chance. Unfortunately, we didn't got a chance to talk about it this morning. I talked about my problems and Louis' medical history and forgot what it was all about: us.

After it turned out that Louis secretly filmed us, perhaps to blackmail us one day, I don't want to take care of him anymore, and I don't want to know anything about him anymore. He didn't deserve it, because he shamelessly betrayed me, to get Zayn. I hate him for it. But how do I explain my behaviour to my wife when my visits to the hospital suddenly stop?

Just as I turn into our street, I see Zayn get out of his car. He looks grumpy and seems so depressed. He lowered his eyes, his face looks pale and dark bags under his eyes were clearly visible. The black clothes complete the dreariness. It is his final walk into his old house. It is his most important talk with his wife. It is his farewell from here.