Little Mixed Directions

Chapter Twenty- Three: I Know I Wouldn't

{Perrie's POV}

I wake up with a shocking pain in my neck. I stretch up and move my head and neck to remove the pain. Ellie is still sound asleep in the pram, which is unusual for her to still be asleep. Louis went and got the pram for her last night after Doctor Renn returned.

{Flashback}

I look up and Doctor Renn is walking towards us. Niall, Liam and I all jump up and Doctor Renn chuckles. "What's going on?" Liam asks, obviously panicking like the rest of us.

"Zayn's got a blood clot in his neck, we have to remove it immediately. Can you sign these please, as next of kin?" Doctor Renn asks me. I quickly look over them before signing, allowing Doctor Renn to go and save my husband.

{End Flashback}

Blood clot in his neck. A brain clot that turned into a tumor is what killed my father, except it was in his brain, and it's not going to kill my husband too. F**king Satan is not taking Zayn too. I'll be like Jesus and dance with the devil on my back if I have to, just to prove Zayn will live. He has too.

Most of the others are awake, or wake up now as we hear footsteps running towards us. Tricia, Waliyha, Safaa and Yaser enter, panting a little, tear stained faces like the rest of us, sympathetic looks. 

Tricia looks right into my eyes and I feel mine swelling up I look down at Ellie who is waking up so I can distract myself. 

Ellie mumbles and starts to kick her legs around, squealing. She has no clue at all. Not a care in the world, life is so simple for her. Sometimes I wish I was a child again, but I'd never trade any of this.

Ellie makes a squeak noise and smiles at me. I smile back and she giggles. No matter what, I'll always have Ellie, if I can't have Zayn, I have Ellie at least. She's giving me so much hope that her Dadda will live.

I look back up at Zayn's family. Niall is hugging Safaa, Jesy is hugging Waliyha and Liam is explaining to Tricia and Yaser. I watch Tricia cover her mouth and shake her head. I have no clue what it'd be like to be Tricia and Yaser right now. Their son could die and there's hardly anything they can do. I'd hate to feel like I couldn't do anything for Ellie. 

I stand up and Tricia walks over, embracing me into a big hug. I hug her back and comfort my mother in law as she cries her heart out for her son. 

We hear a put on cough and break from our hug to see Doctor Renn. "Perrie." He says. I nod and he looks at all the others, indicating he wants to tell me privately. I'm sick of this, having to repeat something to them that's tearing me up.

"They can all hear. They're his family too." I tell Doctor Renn and he sighs and then nods.

"So, we removed the clot successfully and-"

"It's not going to turn into a tumour is it?" I ask him, panicking because that's what happened to my Dad.

"Hold your horses!" Doctor Renn chuckles. "No, it won't. Tumours are generally genetic." He adds. Oh great! Now I feel great knowing I might get one later in life. "The operation was successful. We've moved him down into the recovery ward, you can all come." Doctor Renn smiles.

We all nod and I grab the pram, following close behind Doctor Renn. When we get down there Doctor Renn shows us the room and we go inside. I stand near the door, watching Tricia and Waliyha rush over to his bedside. Most of the others rush around but I just stand away, unable to look to close because this is scaring the shit out of me.

"Perrie do you want to?" Jade asks and I shake my head almost immediatley. I can't go over there. It's reminding me too much of my Dad and I'm trying to keep certain that Zayn will live.