The Silence

Chapter Twenty Three

Saint:

Julian was asleep again. After I'd put my guitar away he'd curled up in my arms and we'd spent some time just talking to each other about things. It was funny. As close as we'd been earlier, naked and in each other's arms with nothing between us, I felt like we'd been closer in that moment more than ever. There was something that had been stripped away now. Something that didn't make us feel so hesitant to share how we were feeling with each other as much anymore and it just made everything we'd spoken about mean that much more. I loved him and he loved me... and it didn't feel like there was anything in this world that could change that now.

"I want to find my father." Julian had whispered. "My real father. Even if I have to go behind my mother's back to do it. I need to find him."

"You don't think maybe your mother left for a reason?" I asked.

"It's not so much because I want to build a relationship with him." He'd sighed and fiddled with his hair. "But I just...I can't stop thinking about my last test results. If my hearing loss is hereditary...then I could understand. The not knowing is what's killing me...scares me. What if I do lose my hearing soon? What if that's not the end of it? What if I start losing something else too? My sight...my mind..." He'd scoffed out loud but his voice had started to shake and it had taken everything in me not to march over to Julian's mother right then and there and demand to know who his father was. Was hiding it really worth it anymore? Did she not see what it was doing to him?

I reached out to brush my finger over his ear lightly. He'd taken out his hearing aid again and just before he'd dozed off, he'd tied his hair into a small bun on top of his head. He looked even cuter than he had before and I pulled out my phone again too. I swiped past the picture I'd taken of him sleeping earlier and took another one, a different angle this time that showed his cheekbones and his beautiful eyelashes. God, he was gorgeous. Especially sleeping like this, his face as relaxed as it would ever be. It bugged me that I couldn't seem to get Julian right in my sketches. My fingers never got it right, and the color was always, always wrong, but I had enough to work with now so that I could make it perfect. OK, maybe not perfect, but as close to perfect as I could get.

"Show me." Julian giggled as he plucked a string on my guitar and I winced. I handed him my cigarette and he held it for me while I showed him which strings to play.

"It's easy." I said and he rolled his eyes, dumping my cigarette in an ash tray.

"Easy for you." He muttered and I patted the space between my legs, moving my guitar out of the way.

"Come sit here." He eyed me suspiciously but eventually he came to sit between my legs and I held the guitar up to his chest, putting his hand on the strings. "Are you watching?"

"Yeah."

"The first two. The third. Then the last one and two – "

"Start again."

"You said you were watching!"

"I was watching your hands, not the strings." He admitted and I flicked him on the nose. "Saint!"

"Pay attention."

"I am!"

He did in the end. When he could play a little on his own, he whooped and spun around to kiss me.

"That was so cool."

"I don't want you to play the guitar." I said and dropped it on my bed with a huff.

"What?" He looked hurt. "Why?"

"You'll get callouses." I mumbled and took his hands in mine, turning them over so he could see the tips of his red fingers. "You have beautiful hands. Piano hands. Not guitar hands."

"So will you teach me how to play the piano?" He looked at me with his blue eyes wide and innocent like a puppy.

"If you want." He beamed happily and fell back into his place between my legs.

"I want."

"You two leaving so soon?" Evelyn asked when we finally ventured down the stairs again.

"Yeah, I need to get home soon or my mom will worry." Julian said and she came over to give him a hug.

"Well it was lovely to see you again, Julian. Come over any time. Really."

"Thank you for dinner." He replied.

I left them to talk while I called Peter to the front of the house and by the time Julian came out the front door, I had the door open for him.

"Thank you." He smiled at me softly and gave me a kiss just as he ducked into the car.

I held his hand during the drive and he played with my own callouses, stroking them lightly and asking me random questions.

"Do you prefer the guitar or the piano?"

"Guitar."

"Coffee or – "

"Coffee." I said. "Always coffee."

"Sketching or painting?"

"How do you know I paint?" He gave me a look that said I was being stupid again.

"I spent the entire night in your house. You think I didn't snoop?"

"I think you didn't. I think Evelyn needs to shut her mouth." I grumbled and he laughed.

"So is your favourite colour really black?" He asked and I chuckled.

"Yes. Why do you ask?"

"Mine isn't really pink." He bit his tongue like he was trying not to laugh. "It's white."

"What?"

"I just wanted to see what you would say!" He laughed and I shook my head at him.

"Now I have to rethink everything you've ever told me." I tsked and he smacked my arm.

"Everything else was true."

The car pulled up to Julian's house and I got out to help him when I noticed another car in Julian's driveway besides his mother's. I didn't understand... What were the police doing here? Was something wrong?

"Julian! Julian, come here." His mother said frantically from the front door but, Julian moved closer to my side when a pair of officers walked over to us.

"Good afternoon. May I ask which one of you is Nicholas Colton?" One of the officers asked.

"Me..." I said with a frown. "I'm ...I'm Nicholas Colton." The officers shared a look and I don't know what I was thinking when they took out a pair of handcuffs, but when they held them out and told me they were placing me under arrest, I was in shock.

"What?"

"Are you joking?" Julian said next to me. "For what?"

"For the assault of a Landon Malone."

"WHAT?!" Julian yelled and I could only stare open-mouthed as handcuffs went around my wrists and the other officer told me my rights.

"You have the right to remain silent - "

"Julian!"

"No, wait..."

"Anything you say or do, can and will be used against you in the court of law - "

"Fuck, Saint, what the hell is going on?"

"JULIAN!"

"You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be provided for you. Do you understand, Sir?"

"Saint..." I couldn't stop staring at Julian's eyes...

"Sir? Do you understand?"

"Yes..." I whispered.

And then they shoved me in the back of a car and drove me away.