No Rememberance - A Deacury Fanfiction

5. Love of My Life, Don't Leave Me

FIRST CHAPTER OF THE SWITCH IS UP!!!

And yes, The-Invisible-Deaky, WHICH I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT...and uh...yeah. :p

Thanks to my best best best very best friend MirandaDeacon, for coming up with the dream scene at the end of #4. I loved the idea and honestly my heart broke when Deaky was crying after the dream and when he called out to Freddie and all that jazz.

Onto the chapter!! Also, it's John in first person for this chapter.

John

Should I get out of bed today?

Honestly, I don't know. Hard to believe that yesterday I got out of bed with a smile on my face, Freddie right next to me, and I was happy.

Now, I can barely fathom a smile on my face.

I stay laying in bed with all of the covers piled on to my body. I will only get up if I need to.

"JOHN GET UP!!" Roger runs into my room and jumps right onto the small dent Freddie made in our bed. I want it not to bother me, yet it does.

"I'm not getting up," I reply, burying even further into the blankets.

"We're going to the hospital today."

"Ok. Have fun."

"John," I can feel Roger get up. He comes by my side and sits on the floor. "You can't have the thought that you're not coming with us, because you are."

"No, I'm not."

"You need this. Freddie needs this."

"No, he doesn't. He needs the pills. I overheard that doctor talking about pills he's going to take when they discharge him."

"He also needs you."

I pause, sitting up. "Fine. I'll go. But I can't, and won't talk to him. It'll--"

"Hurt too much, I know." He pulls me in for a hug. "You can and will be strong. You'll get stronger. Brian and I will be here right to the end."

"It's funny of you to think I have the strength to begin with--"

"Stop." He pulls away. "Stop...stop doing that. I hate that. Brian hates that. Freddie..." He stops, correcting the words in his head. "Freddie hated that. Stop doubting yourself and you just might feel a little bit stronger, okay?"

"Okay, Roger. Now get out so I can get some clothes on."

"Alright, John." He leaves and I venture to my side of the closet. All I do is stare.

Great, now I'm the indecisive one.

I glanced to Freddie's side of the closet.

Maybe I could...

Well, he would never know it's his stuff...

Though I'm hesitant at first, I slide over to his side and look through all of his clothes.

"Where is it..um...oh! There it is!" From all of Freddie's clothes, I found a shirt adorned with stars. I felt like I was wrong to wear Freddie's clothes, but I still put the shirt on. I picked out the rest of my clothes, put them on, and walked out of the bedroom door.

"Do you want breakfast?" Roger asked.

"I'm fine. I'm gonna make a smoothie." I've been making them for a while since I heard they were a better alternative.