Maplestar's Light

Chapter 2

-- Ch. 2

Does it feel like a trial?

Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?

The next few days introduced a new routine. Larkwing came up with a new strategy to help Mapleshade work through her grief and anger -

"At sunrise, you tell me one thing about one of your kits that you miss and loved. At sundown, tell me what you think Oakstar or Appledusk - or, any cat involved other than yourself, really - deserves for what they did."

It was working, mostly. Mapleshade found herself recovering faster, and every time she vented to Larkwing, the thoughts of violence she'd been having for moons left her mind, settled as she realized that, at the end of the day, they wouldn't do much good. She remained in the medicine den overnight, but went out into camp for most of the day, mostly walking laps and doing apprentices' work when the apprentices weren't available. Usually, she felt the same old stares on her from warriors, and listened to the whispers of the Clan. Every now and then, she caught them talking with Heatherstar or Reedfeather, and overheard the conversations.

"You need to get her out of here. She's a ThunderClan exaltee! Who knows what trouble she'll bring to the Clan?"

"She is sick," The high ranks would always reply. "And unless StarClan themselves come to tell us to exile her, she will stay."

And the warriors would leave in a huff, always unhappy.

She bonded well with the apprentices, usually picking up tasks for them or teaching them unique ThunderClan tricks to try out on their spare time. Their enthusiasm was her validation, as was that of the kits, who eventually came to join her during storytime. The elders grew fond of her after she cycled through with prey and mouse bile a few times, expressing how glad they were to have such a responsible young molly taking care of them when so many warriors seemed to ignore them, or forget to visit.

"My daughter, Dawnstripe," Lilywhisker had chimed one day, "Only visits me when she has to deliver something. I only see her then, and when Heatherstar calls for a meeting. Now, I ask you, Mapleshade, how is that fair?"

"It's not," Mapleshade responded, shaking her head. "In ThunderClan, our cats are always visiting our elders. When I was there, we held the utmost respect for you!"

"I suppose that's the only thing ThunderClan does right," Flailfoot chuckled, earning soft laughs from Lilywhisker and Mapleshade.

Mistmouse tended to talk to her, as Mapleshade was used to caring for her kits when she needed a minute's rest. Ryekit, Doekit and Stagkit were apprenticed before leaf-fall, and she cheered loud with Mistmouse at their naming. The nursery was quickly filled again by Brackenwing - one of the mollies who hadn't taken well to Mapleshade's staying in camp. The loss of one of her closer friends had hurt her, but she didn't suffer too long - in mid leaf-fall, another molly entered the nursery.

"Oh! You're Mapleshade, right?"

She'd looked up from fixing the nests, blinking in surprise at the tiny black-and-white queen before her.

"I should hope so. You are?"

"Palebird," She chirped. "Sorry to be in your way! I'm just choosing a nest."

"Ah! Is it your first litter?"

"Sure is! Sandgorse is the father," Palebird purred, perking as Mapleshade shifted to one side and offered her the nest she'd just finished. "Neither of us are in love - thank you so much! - but we both wanted kits! So he agreed to surrogate for me. To tell you the truth, though, I'm a little nervous. It sounds like kitting hurts so much."