All Roads Lead Home (Book #1)

Chapter 21

I left without a proper goodbye. I couldn't say it to their faces, especially not to Jay. All I left him was a letter explaining why I left. I explained to him how I couldn't stay because of everything that happened.

I can't keep making them feel miserable because I am. I keep them up at night with worry. Sometimes it's just the screams as the nightmares return and hold me captive over and over again.

I won't keep Jay from his baby. Not my Jayden. I love him too much to keep such an important part of his life hidden. I just can't be here right now.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Krystah's gone."

"What? Jayden are you sure she's gone?"

"Yeah Ava. Look at this letter."

Jay,

I love you all too much to make you suffer along with me. I can't put you all through my pain anymore. I love you all too much for that. Mike hurt me and I need to do this on my own for right now. You've supported me as much as you can, but it's time for you guys to get back to your own lives.

He beat me, raped me and tried to kill me. I can't get the dreams and memories out of my head. They haunt me daily. No matter how hard I try to keep the monster out of my head that's where he remains.

Jay, I hate to leave you. It's like you said before I left, we've been through a lot of shit that most couples our age wouldn't have made it through. But this time I'm not sure how we can make it through. 

By the time you read this letter I'll be long gone. Please don't try to follow me. This is what I need to do for me. Don't try to call me. 

I'll return someday when I feel like I can be normal with all of you guys again. Hopefully it doesn't take too long.

Please forgive me Jay. I'll always love you all and I appreciate all of you trying to help, but it didn't work. Goodbye for now.

Krystah

"She wouldn't have just left, right Ava? Maybe she went to her house?"

"I'm not sure Jay," Ava says as she re-reads the letter.

"I thought she was doing better," Jay asks as he grabs the letter out of Ava's hand.

"She needs some time Jay. She thought she was okay but she's scared," Ava says as she grabs her purse and phone off the counter.

"Ethan? Ethan!" Ava calls as Jay reads the letter again.

"What? What's wrong?" Ethan asks as he comes running into the kitchen.

"Krystah's gone. We have to find her," Ava says as she looks at Jayden. "Jay, are you alright?" she asks as he starts to sway slightly, then starts to fall forward.

"Whoa, I got you," Ethan says as he catches him as he faints. "What's going on Ava? Just call Krystah's phone," he says as he checks Jayden's breathing.

"Is he alright?" Ava asks.

"Yeah he's fine. He just fainted. Did you call Krys?" he asks as he picks up the letter that Jayden dropped. He reads it quickly. "She left?"

"Yes and we have to go after her," Ava says as she puts her phone in her purse. "Are you coming?"

"Technically she can leave if she wants to. She's 18 Ava. We can't make her come back if she doesn't want to," Ethan says as he leans against the counter reading the letter again.

"Can we at least look?" Jayden asks as he begins to stand up off the floor. Ethan helps to keep him steady until he regains his balance. "We have to try, right Ethan?"

"We'll look Jay, but we don't know what time she left or what direction she was heading in. We don't even know if she took her car, her dads' car or his jeep," Ethan says as he looks between Jayden and Ava.

"Ethan, please," Jayden begs. "I have to try. You read the letter, right? She left because she thinks it's better for all of us and she's wrong. I have to try," he says as he begins to walk to the front door.

"Jay wait. We have to think about this logically," Ethan says as he puts his hand on Jayden's shoulder to stop him. "We need more people to help. Are Josh and Jenn here?"

"Yeah. Josh is upstairs in his room playing video games with Ellie," Ava says as Jayden sits down on one of the barstools. "Jenn and Aaron are out in the pool."

"Okay. Let's get them," Ethan says as he begins to jog to the back door. "Jenn! Aaron! We need you in here, now! We need your help!"

"Coming dad!" Jenn calls as they both come running towards the house. "What's going on?"

"I'll explain in the house. Come on," he says as they walk back to the kitchen. "Good. Everyone's here."

"Not Krystah. Where..." Jenn begins to ask, then she looks at Jayden still sitting on the barstool. "Jay?"

"Okay guys, we need to form up in teams. Krystah left sometime after we all went to bed. She left a note saying she was leaving and not coming back. She doesn't want to put us through more of her dreams or sleepless nights," Ethan explains, only glancing towards Jayden once to gauge his response.

"We need to find her," Jenn says. "Why are we standing here talking?"

"Because we need to make a plan Jenn," Jayden says as he comes over to the table. "There's four main roads out of town that she would have taken. I'll drive North and check her house to see what vehicle she's in. Jenn and Aaron," he says as he looks at them, "you guys go East. Josh and Ellie take the road South. Ethan, you and Ava go West," Jay says. Everyone nods in agreement. "I'll call you as soon as I know what vehicle she's in."

"Okay. Let's go everyone. Keep your phones on and ready," Ethan says as he grabs his phone from the table.

Everyone stands up and all head out to their cars. Ethan stops Jayden as he's climbing into his truck.

"Are you going to be okay? Ava can come with you if..."

"I'm fine. Let's just try to find her," Jay says as he closes the door behind him, starts the truck and drives away.