Little Though She Be

Home(Family)sick

This chapter is dedicated to SionKaT3 for inspiring me to finally start this and finish the first chapter. Without them, it would have taken me much longer to wrote this. Thank you!

Pidge sighed, pulling her knees up to her chest. She looked out the window again, resting her head against it. Earth seemed so far away. She had counted up how long it would take them to get there. She had looked at Coran's star charts and compared the positions. She knew how far they were.

But it still seemed so much farther away.

When Pidge had been on Earth, it had been hard. Pretending to be a boy, knowing that her family could still be out there, knowing that it was all a big coverup. Staying up all night to listen to alien radio chatter, trying to piece together what had happened to her family, avoiding all detection. Hating being at the Garrison without her brother and father, hating not being able to see her mom. She missed her short hair, her freedom. She had been a wild, free child, and had hated being restricted. Hating the people that held her to such high standards, hating the world for keeping her from knowing. Wishing that people would just make some small adjustments for her, making life so much easier, wishing that people could understand. 

She'd hated life on Earth after her dad, Samuel, and her brother, Matt, had left on the Kerberos Mission. Her mom, Colleen, had been quiet and withdrawn, always afraid, always grieving. She wasn't allowed to find out the truth, and that infuriated her. Pidge had attacked the only way she could and felt vindicated when they scratched their heads, bamboozled, her being able to be there and watch them the entire time, right under their noses.

But she'd been all alone. She'd held her team at a distance, her mom was gone, and her dad and brother were missing. 

That was what she missed. She wasn't homesick, no, she hadn't cared for her home at all. It was her family she was sick for, family she craved for. Sure, the rest of the crew were slowly becoming her family, but they weren't there yet. And until they were, she would be all alone, wanting, wishing, craving for family. She wanted her family. She wanted them more than anything else.

But she couldn't just leave. She was making a new family, and Katie Holt did not ever leave family behind for any reason. She knew that she would hate herself for the rest of eternity if she ever did that. Any family. 

Pidge sighed again and stood up. She was done feeling pity for herself. She was a Paladin of Voltron. She was strong. She was bold and brave and daring. She would shove aside this useless self-pity, and keep on going strong, for her family if not for herself. 

She walked out to the kitchen to see Hunk. Maybe he'd give her a snack or some cooking lessons. She'd been getting better at cooking. Now her food actually looked like food and not food goo like Coran's. Hunk had been so proud of her.

She briefly wondered if Sam and Matt and Colleen would have been proud of her, but ruthlessly crushed the thought, walking into the kitchen. "Hey, Hunk." She greeted, only to stop short. The Yellow Paladin was sitting by the table, head in his arms. He wasn't crying. Pidge knew the second she saw him what was wrong.

She sat by him. "Homesick?" She inquired gaily. Hunk ignored her, but she could hear him dance. Sighing, she remarked. "You know, it's ok to be homesick." Hunk sighed as well. "I'm probably the only one feeling this way. I feel so weak."

Pidge sighed. "Well, I'm not homesick at all." She admitted. "I hated Earth after Dad and Matt left. But... You aren't alone." Hunk seemed interested. "Yeah?" She smiled at him, although she knew that she couldn't see it. "I'm pretty sure that everybody else on board feels the same way, 'cept for me."