You Said Remember Me

69

Victoria stared at him not sure if she was hearing right. Jumbles of thoughts ran through her mind but she couldn't think about them clearly.

"What?" she asked.

"I..."

"Shut up." she snapped. "Don't talk nonsense to me."

"I'm not speaking nonsense, I know who I am, I know who you are, I know myself," he told. "You're not through with him and I know you'll never forget that. But it doesn't matter to me because he put you here in this position, whatever you say to contradict reality I can wait until you leave him behind. I'll end it as that for today."

She watched him drive away feeling frustration flow within her. What was he saying? Why was he copying the words Donghae once told her? Why were they putting her in this position?

/////

"Oppa!" Hee Sun's voice reached his ears before he turned from leaning against his car.

Uncrossing his arms he turned to see Hee Sun walking toward him with a plastic bowl and cover on it.

"Mom says to bring this home for you and uncle to eat," she told.

"Thanks." he said taking it from her.

"Are you ok, oppa? You've been dazing a lot since Eunhyuk left," she said trying to get him to tell her...anything.

"I'm fine Hee Sun. Tell your mom we'll eat these well," Donghae said before opening the car to his door.

"Oppa," she called grabbing his arm suddenly. When he turned to face her she asked, "You're never going to leave me behind, right?"

He looked at her for a long time and just smiled. "I have to go now, Hee Sun." And with just those words he drove off without looking back once.

Walking into the quiet house Donghae put the bowl into the fridge and looked around the house imagining it for a moment as the summer house. When he'd knocked out for two days from being sick and when Victoria had been pounding furiously on his door came back to him. He stared at the door as if she would walk in any moment. That night when she'd begun hurting because of him became so clear. Why had he been so lost? Unable to say anything? When he'd turned cold she wanted to patch up their relationship to try and make it better, but he'd turned it around. He regretted it.

Heading up the stairs he walked into his bedroom and stopped to stare at the photo frame on his desk. Grabbing it he glanced at the happy picture before him compiled with sweet memories. He couldn't let her move on. He couldn't let her have feelings for someone else when he was still there.

He'd remembered Victoria's schedule and had arrived at her house just a few minutes before she'd head back from school. He'd cancelled all plans with Hee Sun and Chief Kang that evening so he was free to do what he wanted. He sat on the front of her steps hearing Melodix's shriek from inside the house. It also felt like forever since he'd seen the dog and he wondered if she was any bigger now.

A few minutes later as predicted Victoria drove into her driveway noticing him but didn't show anything different on the expression of her face. It was like one of those times when he'd began visiting her without reason. He stood up when she got out of her car.

"Can you accompany me for a while?" he asked without waiting for her to say anything.

After parking his car by the riverside they sat by the shore. She watched silently on as he tossed rocks endlessly onto the water. He slowly organized his mind as he watched the rocks skip across the surface of the river.

He was aware that he was wasting her time and probably even hurting her by seeing her again. But he was glad at least that they were sitting side by side.

"Are you and Eunhyuk really seeing each other?" he finally asked.

They didn't look at each other and they refused to let their longing for each other become apparent. Victoria had expected the question from him because she seemed ready to answer.

"I thought you'd ask Eunhyuk," she said.

"I didn't want to hear the answer from him," was all Donghae told and that was the truth.

He felt a bit upset at Eunhyuk and he knew Hyuk was right when he'd said he'd placed Victoria and himself in that situation. There was clearly nothing he could do to change it.

Victoria ran through the thoughts in her mind. What would be the best answer? To save not just herself but everybody?

"We are," she lied.

Donghae's heart sank. He was disappointed only in himself. "Are you telling me the truth?"

Victoria hesitated and wanted to tell him no but pressed on, "Yes."

They were silent.

"Hee Sun...she's always been crazy for you," Victoria said recalling all the moments she'd seen that girl go jealous, "it would be nice if you just concentrate on her."

She was saying the same thing Eunhyuk had told him countless times, but he'd failed at doing even that. Donghae didn't see himself as the perfect man for Hee Sun because he couldn't do anything for her. But he wanted to do everything for the woman sitting next to him.

"What if I can't?' he asked feeling horribly weak.

Victoria felt her heart pound miserably. Why was he doing this to her?

"Why...would you leave me like this when you made me put behind In Seol just after 7 months that I lost him?" she asked her quiet voice gradually getting louder. "Why are you being so stupid! You walked away from me after ignoring me and now you want to come back? What's going through your mind? Why would you do this in the first place?! Why! You make me feel like the dumbest woman alive. I don't want to walk in this circle with you."

"I can't..." he began, "let you walk away and forget me when every part of me only remembers you."

"Don't confuse me Lee Donghae," she warned with angry eyes that told him she wasn't willing to forgive him, "if we break here we're done for. You shouldn't have started this in the first place if you can't keep up with it."

He knew she was right. She was always right.

"When he left you, why didn't you go to his family?" he suddenly asked.

"He grew up an orphan, who was I supposed to go to? The orphanage?" she asked trying to be sarcastic but didn't sound it one bit.

He smiled a bit then leaned to his left resting his head against her shoulder.

"I'm glad then," he said, "because someone made a way for us to meet."

He felt her turn away from him and they were silent as the river flowed calmly by.

/////

Eunhyuk stopped his car in front of her house and knocked on the door and rung the doorbell but she didn't come to the door. Only Melodix answered him.

"Victoria! Are you home?" he asked.

He glanced in her driveway to find her car there. Was she sleeping? But she never slept that early. Taking a step backward he glanced at the door about to take out his phone when he noticed something sitting to the side of the steps almost buried under the bushes. Taking one more step back to get a better look he realized that it was a bouquet of red roses.

"What's this doing here?"

Reaching for the flowers he observed them before noticing the white envelope on the ground.

"Looks familiar." he thought opening the envelope taking out the card.

"Why aren't you remembering me? Have you tried at all to find who I am?"

Eunhyuk frowned at the strange note. He turned the card around to look for a name but didn't find any.

"What are you doing?" Victoria suddenly asked.

Eunhyuk spun around hiding the card behind his back but the bouquet was still tucked in his arm. She glanced at the roses.

"I...brought them for my mom," he immediately lied then thought why?

"They're ugly," she commented.

"Ah...really?"

Victoria nodded.

"Then I should get new ones, huh?" he asked.

Victoria just stared at him as if he were talking to himself. "Why are you here?"

"Oh..." Eunhyuk smiled. "I just came by to see how you were doing."

"Are you thinking I might start ignoring you?" she asked as if he were accusing her of something.

"No," he replied, "even if you did I'd still be in your face."

She looked worn out.

"Where were you?" he asked.