Life Begins To Blur (Mean Girls)

There's just something 'bout you

Tw: depression and self harm.

Janis POV:

I am awake, but I don't feel anything.
Alive, but I don't see anything..
Aware, but I don't know anything...
Barely holding on.

Young girls shouldn't cry as they are forced to slash the skin from their wrists, the hurt from the eyes... Never reaching the pain in their hearts.

But this is what you did.

Young girls shouldn't cry.

Young girls shouldn't die.

~~~~~

I'd never seen you cry before. You were strong, brave. My light, my rock, my shield. And I tore you down.

I never wanted to hurt you.

And yet our lives are tangled.

I hurt myself and you fall too.

~~~~~

I hate you for keeping me here when I want to run.

I hate you for leaving me in pain.

I hate you.

I love you for holding me as I cry for a thousand years.

I love you as the tears roll from your eyes in return and you really truly care.

I love you.

I hate that I can't hurt you.

I hate that I can't leave.

I hate that I love you.

But I do.