Treat You Better (Larry Stylinson)

Hello...

Hey! It's been a while since I've written and i know this story is completed, but since it is one of my most viewed and voted story, i felt like posting this message...so the thing is, I've been out of it for the past few months. My job is so stressful and school is stressful, im just overall tired. I spent the last month dealing with sexual harassment at work and it just brought so much past experiences and it sort of made me depressed.

I try so hard not to talk about my personal life and my childhood and how i grew up because it just makes me sad. But i feel like talking about it will help me grow maybe a bit more and maybe make this feeling go away.

I was molested when i was probably in preschool or kindergarten. I don't remember which, but i do remember being super young. This was the time when my parents were still together and we lived i believe close by arlington. I don't recall when it started, but i do remember a few things.
It starts to get graphic here so don't read if it will trigger you. It's sexual assault.
Me and my family (mom, dad, 2 brothers) lived in an apartment with these two other men that lived in another room. I don't remember one of the guys name but i do remember the one person who ruined my life. I won't say his name for reasons that i just don't feel like his name is that important. He isn't important.
I would remember him touching my butt while i was watching tv in the living room. I didn't think much of it since i was a kid and my mom would sometimes touch my butt. But it was different with him. He would massage it and would just like wouldn't stop. He then would like stick his hand in my pants and just violate me.

He would always do that if he saw i was the only one in the room and no one else was around. Sometimes he would touch me when my brothers were in the same room as me! He made me touch his penis and he would try to like get me to give him a handjob or even a blowjob. I always refused and sometimes he would just grab my hand and just make me do it.

One night he took me into his room with his roommate in there who was asleep and would try to get me to sit on his lap and he would just rub off against me. He tried taking my pants off and I'm just so thankful he didn't rape me that night.

The moment that this ended, i didn't know that it was going to stop. My father luckily walked in on him touching me and he immediately called the police. I still remember having to try to explain to the police what he was doing to me. I remember the sad look in one of the cops face when i pointed on the teddy bear on where he was touching me. I was crying so much because i was scared and overwhelmed.

Everything else was a blur after that. I remember going to the courts and i do remember my mom tearing up a picture of him and tossing it in the floor.

It was over...

Unfortunately my parents not long after separated and i was living with my uncles for i don't know how long. We then moved to falls church and i later met my stepdad and not long after my life long best friend.

My mom was becoming more and more abusive and it was always directed towards me. And i don't understand why i was always targeted and i felt like the reason behind this abuse was the fact that i was sexually assaulted by a man my family trusted so much. She would verbally abuse me and physically abuse me. She would leave marks on my skin and marks in my brain. My dad even ended up calling the  police on her because she beat me up so badly my back was so red and my legs, lip, and back was bruised and swollen.

The abuse stopped a little. It was more verbal. In the 5th grade, we moved to Woodbridge close to my stepdads job. I was in middle school and my rebellious ways begun. I got introduced to weed and i guess sex a little later on. I was always smoking weed and i fell in a wrong crowd. This was after the 6th grade though. Still very young though. I also harmed myself a lot. I was a very depressed kid and harming myself was just this pleasuring pain to me. It was something that i could control and the only pain no one else but me could conflict.

I was assaulted by the boys at school. They would smack my butt or pinch it or my boobs. They were desperate. My first kiss was when i was 11...the guy was 17. I lost my virginity at 13 and i was just a mess. I moved to fairfax during the eighth grade where i was struggling with my sexuality. I knew i liked girls but i never admitted it. It was always assumed by people since elementary school that i was gay or at least bisexual. That took a long time for me to accept it.

High school got better. I was still hoeing around as you can say. I did have a lot of people interest. I would jump person to person and hook up with them.

Now as a junior in high school, i feel grown. I don't take care of myself as much but I'm getting there. But when i got harassed i just fell in a hole of drinking and crying and smoking. My boss didn't believe me until i showed him the proof and it made me feel sick because you would assume that they would do something about it the moment it's reported. He didn't..he took long to do it and assumed that i was just lying.

Im working on myself now and i feel like this whole rant made me feel a little better. Im trying and i know it will take some time. Thank you for reading