The Shit I Fucking Go Through [ An Ereri Story]

0:02

Burning.

I woke up the next morning with my skin feeling like it was on fire. The worst part is that I couldn't touch nor itch it because that would just make it even worse.

''You deserve this.''

I know that. I know.

I got up and stripped myself of my clothes again before heading into the shower. This time I actually only used water. After the quick (and painful) shower I pulled open my drawer only to find hundreds of bottles of ointment. I grabbed a random one and started applying it to my wounds.

"Eren! Breakfast is ready!!!" I heard my mom call.

I sighed as I quickly finshed wrapping my body up in gauze and threw on a shirt before heading upstairs.

"Goodmornin honey!" my mother beamed. ''Hear, I made you eggs and bacon. Eat quickly though so that you aren't late for school.''

I mentally groaned. I hate how my mom can act as though nothing had happend the day prior. She's always so...bipolar that it pisses me off. Not to mention the fact that I live with her. I'm in college and all of my 'friends' live on campus by theirselves already while I'm here stuck living with my mom because she thinks I'm 'Not responsible enough.'

"Thanks Mom.'' I muttered quietly sitting down and quickly eating my food so that I could get my ass out of there.

"Woah Honey calm down I wouldn't want you to choke!" my mother exclaims fakely.

''I hope you do choke Eren. You deserve to.''

''You can choke on this dic--''

I shook my head. ''Sorry.''

You see I have these..voices in my head. Most of the time they're all rude and tell my that I'm worthless or I should die. But other times there are voices who say the most fucked up things. I like to call the rude ones Sina and the fucked up ones Maria.

I finished eating my food and grabbed my bag opening the front door muttering a quick bye to my mother before slamming the door shut. I ran all the way to campus so that I could check in the janitors closet if there were any new chemicals that I could pour on or in my body.

When I finally made in there I was it was 45 minutes before classes would start and there wasn't a lot of people there.

Perfect.

Quickly making my way down the halls I came across one of the many Janitors closets. I opened the door and slipped inside making sure to lock the door. Immediately the smell of toxic chemical entered my scent. I almost gushed at how bad I wanted to fill my insides with them.

The closet was a bit dark and I didn't really wanna crawl around to find the light switch so instead I used my phones flashlight to help me look around.

"Hmm,'' I spoke aloud. ''Windex...Lysol, PineSol...Clorox....Bleach!"

I grabbed the big bottle of bleach with a smile on my face.

"But..If I drink this would it kill me? Maybe I should make new cuts and just pour this in those..''

''Great Idea!"

...Thank you Sina.

I opened the lid and smelled the inside before pulling away from me. The smell was very strong. I carefully raised my shirt and poured a bit of bleach onto my cuts.

I hissed in pain. It felt so, good.

"Hey what are you doing!?''

I whipped my head around at the sound of the new voice causing even more bleach to fall into my cuts.

"A-Ah!"

"Oh my god..'' The boy gasped as he reached out to me.

"Ah-h~"

We both stopped. ''Did you just....moan?'' He asked me.

I was in too much of a daze to even care about what I was saying. "Y-Yea..it feels....good.''

The boys turns around for a second before flipping what turned out to be the light switch. I could now see his face clearly. Black hair parted in middle; Emotionless stoic face. His beautiful Gray eyes that showed only the slightest amount of worry. He looked really...nice.

''Did you say that it felt good?'' he asked.

I snapped out of my daze and locked eyes with him. That's when I realized that someone had just witness this side of me. The dark, depressing side.

"U-Uh no! No I-I didn't!"

"Yes you did. I heard you. Don't lie I don't like liars.''

I mentally cringed as that was one of the same lines my mom used on me. I quickly tried to change the subject.

"W-Why are you in here?!''

He rolled his eyes. "OCD. That's all you need to know. Now back to the original question.''

I was slightly taken aback from the quick response. I had no where to go. I was trapped but I couldn't let anyone know about this. So I quickly put the bleach down, picked up my bag, and raced for the door.

"Hey!" He called back. "You have to tell me why you were in here!"

I stopped as my hand rested on the door knob.

"Sadness. That's all you need to know.''

I yanked the door open and left the closet smelling like chemicals. Leaving the small handsome teen shocked.
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