Broken Windows // Phan AU

Chapter Fifteen: Innocence and Experience

warning: sexual content ahead.

~~~

All throughout my day at work, I can't stop thinking about my date with Dan last night. Fond memories keep popping up in my head, and it's difficult to brush them away and get back to work. He slept in my bed last night, and despite how badly I wanted to touch him and kiss him and maybe try and take things a step further, I knew he'd had a few drinks, and it just didn't feel right. I find myself so distracted by my thoughts at work today that I'm starting to fall behind, and soon enough, it's 6:00 and I still haven't clocked out. I quickly pick up my phone and call Dan at my home phone number to let him know I'll be on my way soon, but he doesn't answer, so I leave a message.

When I walk outside, I'm met with a particularly brutal gust of cold wind. I burrow into my thick winter coat as little flurries of snow start to fall, and it takes a while for my car to warm up to a bearable temperature. As soon as I pick up a very excited Nuki and walk in through my front door, I find Dan at his usual spot on the sofa, but this time, he is fast asleep and wrapped in a warm blanket. Phantom is nestled into the folds of the blanket on his lap.

The scene makes my heart swell. Dan looks so warm, so peaceful. I want nothing more than to crawl under the blanket with him and hold him close. Not wanting to disturb him, however, I make my way into the kitchen and start preparing dinner.

Thirty minutes later, I carry two plates of food into the living room where Dan is still sound asleep. I set the plates down, walk over to the edge of the sofa, and gently brush a curly strand of hair away from his forehead. His eyes flutter open and he yawns widely as he glances up at me.

"Oh, sorry," he says groggily while stretching. "I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"It's okay. I made dinner."

He smiles gratefully and we spend the next half hour eating and the rest of the evening watching Netflix documentaries together on the sofa.

Before I know it, it's 11:00 - the time that I usually start heading up to bed on weekdays - but for some reason, tonight, I don't feel very tired. One glance at Dan tells me he doesn't either, after the nap he took earlier.

"I'm gonna go have a shower," I tell him, then head upstairs.

~~~

After my shower, I walk into my room to find Dan lying in my bed, seemingly lost in thought. I have nothing but a towel around my waist. 

"Hey," I greet him.

He sits up. "How was your shower?"

"...Wet."

"Right. Good."

He seems... tense. I don't know how to describe it. He won't take his eyes off of the water droplets falling from my hair and rolling down my chest.

"I should probably put some clothes on," I smile.

"Okay," he replies, turning over and burying his face into the pillows. This makes me chuckle to myself as I step into some boxers and pull a t-shirt over my head.

"Lights out?" I inquire. He peeks his head up and nods. I fall into bed beside him and turn off my bedside lamp. The room is immediately drenched in darkness.

Lying on my back, I try closing my eyes, but my wakefulness keeps prying them back open. After a few minutes, I start to focus on the sound of Dan's breathing, which is light and uneven. He's definitely still awake.

He starts to toss and turn. This goes on for a while until I finally ask him if he's alright.

"I can't sleep," he whispers, lying on his side facing away from me.

"I could tell," I reply softly. By now my eyes have adjusted to the darkness, and I can't help but to stare longingly at the back of his head. I want so badly to wrap my arms around him. After a few moments, hesitatingly, I turn to him and drape my arm over his warm body.

I find his hand, and he laces his fingers through mine. Then I plant some kisses into the nape of his neck. He turns his head, then his body toward mine, and we find each other's lips, and soon enough we are making out in the dark.

At one point, he pulls away and tugs off his shirt - "It's so fucking hot in here" - and tosses it to the floor, instantly resuming his connection to my lips afterward.

It's hard to tell how much time goes by before I'm pulling away, looking straight into his eyes, and whispering breathlessly. "Dan, I've gotta be honest, you've got me feeling some kind of way right now..."

"Can I..." he exhales, placing his hand on my knee and slowly trailing it up my leg, getting closer and closer, so close, it's driving me crazy...

I take his hand and slide it upwards to where I want it to be. Jackpot. 

I'm already hard. When he starts to rub up and down, it feels so good, I want to shout for more. But I know this is our first sexual encounter, and I need to take it slow.

So I slowly pull my shirt over my head as I sweat from exhilaration, and I slowly tug my boxers down to give Dan direct access.

In the dark, it's hard to catch his initial reaction to seeing me naked for the first time, but he hesitates for only a moment before grasping my penis in his warm hand and stroking it up and down in such a way that sets my heart beating fast and sends a rush of adrenaline through my whole body.

"I've never done this before..." he whispers timidly. "Is it okay?"

"Yes! Don't stop." The words fall out before I can even think about them.

"C-can I go down on you?"

"Please do," I urge, already so close to satisfaction.

The moment I feel myself inside of his warm, wet mouth, I wish to myself that this moment would last forever. But it takes only a few minutes before the flick of Dan's tongue finally tips me over the edge.

"I'm gonna come," I warn him, but to my surprise, he doesn't pull away. I release my load straight into his mouth with a gasp of euphoria. He holds it in his mouth for a moment before spitting into the wastebasket by my nightstand.

I give us a minute to breathe before pressing his shoulder lightly until he is lying on his back and I'm on top this time. "Your turn?"

He nods as I proceed to slide his pants off and return his favor. Unlike him, I have done this before. Just not in a very, very long time. It feels so good to come back to this. Especially with someone I've been waiting so long to taste.

As Dan's first sexual experience with a guy, or anyone for that matter, he hardly lasts two minutes before reaching his climax, but I relish every second of it.

Afterwards, I spit into the wastebasket just as he had done before me. Then I climb back under the covers with Dan, neither of us bothering to put our clothes back on. I wrap my arms around him like before, but this time, I'm much more relaxed and content.

"How was it?" I ask, genuinely curious about his thoughts.

"So good," he replies, and I can hear the smile in his voice. "I hope it was as good for you as it was for me."

"It might have been better. Are you sure you'd never done that before?"

"Pretty sure. I have seen a lot of porn, though."

I giggle into the nape of his neck. He turns and lies his head on my chest. I kiss his forehead and gently lean my own head against it, closing my eyes. This is the way we finally drift off to sleep.