Through The Dark (Niall Horan Fanfic)

Chapter 25

Niall's POV

After being told to leave her alone, I went back inside. I walked the stairs to our flat and watched out through the hallway window in front of my door as she got into Cassie's car and they drove down the street as soon as the car door closed.

I breathed in a sharp breath, trying not to lose it.

Why had I done that?

I made my way to our flat, leaving the brisk air by the fogged winter window.

Why?

Everything had been perfect.

I could've just forgiven her for making a mistake instead of making her feel worse about herself.

But she wasn't the only one that was allowed to get angry, make mistakes.

But even thinking that in my mind made me feel bad. Aubree didn't deserve that. I loved her and I shouldn't have fought with her.

That was the only thing I hated, though: how I could forgive anything she did because of how much I loved her. I was blinded by my affection for her.

It was like she could murder a person by stabbing them in the heart seven times and my mind and my heart would find a way to believe that it was okay. Just because it was Aubree.

Okay. That's scary.

Maybe not.

But that's what it felt like.

I was just in love with her.

And how she left like that a few minutes before all this chaos in my brain, it felt like I had been stabbed in the heart seven times by her.

And it was okay.

Because I loved her.

I needed to give her space though, so I didn't chase after her. Normally, she would want me to, but I could tell this wasn't one of those times. She was having a bad day and needed some air.

Even though I somehow knew it wasn't really me she was mad with, more like the world, I still curled up in my bed without her, feeling her absence heavily, without dinner, way before the time I usually went to sleep. And I cried. I pulled the sheet over my face and cried into the threaded confines of the sheet. I pulled one of the pillows my head was sinking into down next to me, pathetically pretending it was Aubree and I tried to fall asleep.

But the tears kept me up.

Half of them weren't even the fact that she had left 30 minutes earlier, it was because I didn't want her to keep living like this.

I wanted her to be happy.

I wanted her to genuinely smile.

I wanted her to laugh even harder.

I wanted her to never want to hurt herself again.

I wanted her to be comfortable.

I wanted her to love herself.

I needed it.

Aubree's POV

The breath falling out of my parted lips slowly frosted up the car window more and more each time I exhaled.

I blew on the glass, creating enough fog to carelessly draw patterns with the tip of my index finger on the glass.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?"

I leaned my head against the window, returning my attention to the road in front of Cass and I. The cold surface spread a chilking temperature through my body. It felt good. I pressed my cheek to the window, no doubt coloring my pale skin a red. And then I answered Cassie, "You're going to be mad at me."