Chapter 4
My mind travels a hundred miles per hour, trying to figure out who could be at my front door so late. I don't have any tricks coming over tonight, I don't think. My friends know better than to just stop by, again, since I'm always working, our gatherings usually need to be scheduled, and most likely rescheduled, for months before they actually happen.
"Ooh, my pizza is here." Just like that Brian solves the mystery of the late night visitor and gets off the couch, practically running to the front door to get his food.
It takes him a while to come back. I can hear his voice but I can't really understand what he's saying. One thing I do know, he is using his flirty tone, which is not very nice to hear if it's not directed to you. Or that's just me, I guess.
He takes a seat right next to me and places the individual pizza directly in front of us. Steam comes out as soon as he flips the lid open. The miniature circle has been divided in four triangles, one smaller than the next, yet they are loaded with vegetables. It actually does look good. There are greens and reds placed as toppings, making the pizza seem festive and colorful. It doesn't smell bad either, I can tell as much as he brings a slice to his mouth. One more time he offers to share but I decline, a half full can still in my hand.
I allow him to savor his food, sipping on my warm drink. It's disgusting. But he's enjoying his carbs and I will not be the reason why he stops doing so.
Out of the blue, my mouth gets a mind of its own. "Can I have a bite?"
"Sure!" He reaches over, ready to hand me a slice when I stop him.
"No, I want a bite of that one." I point to the piece in his hands. And he understands is not really the meal that I'm craving, I simply wanna share with him something he is liking so intensely. "Let's bite it at the same time."
Surprisingly, he wordlessly accepts. The -by now- deformed triangle is placed between us and he leans closer, waiting for me to follow suit. Our eyes count to three and, in perfect sync, we both reach for the food. I make sure to stick my tongue out just in time, and I manage to lick his bottom lip right before he moves away.
He let's out a muffled scream, as he tries to cover his full mouth with his hand. "I knew you were gonna do that. I knew it!"
"Now, come here and give me a proper kiss." I purse my lips and scoot closer to him. My eyes are halfway open in anticipation.
"No! Get away from me. You are gonna try to push food into my mouth, as always."
"Don't you want me to tap at the door of your love?"
The memories that are carried by that phrase hit us both at the same time. We start laughing so loud that I'm sure we are waking up all my neighbors. These little moments of happiness are way more valuable than a pissed old lady who can't go back to her REM cycle. So I laugh, I laugh like I can only do when I'm with him. He's just so effortlessly funny that I can't help but kick and punch the air in a stage of total euphoria. Food is literally flying everywhere, which forces me to swallow my over-chewed piece of pizza.
"See? Even now you are rejecting me." My fake crying is worthy of... not a single award, really. I jump between laughing and crying as I dramatically lament his lack of love for me. "Which brings me back to my previous inquiring, if we may."
The empty box is pushed away on the coffee table with a heavy sigh. "We have talked about this before," he reminds me. "You know it would affect so much of our work, our careers..." He starts listing reasons with his fingers, same reasons that I don't give a single fuck about.
I have to stop his lame attempt of excuse. "That's not what I mean, and you know it." I look at him, sitting so close to me, yet so far away. "Sure, we have discussed it many times in the past, in a professional matter. How it could ruin our business ventures, our friendship and whatnot but, going back to my original question, back then, we didn't have any of those, really." I stop for a moment, what I think has always been the actual reason playing at the tip of my tongue. "You know, you can just say you don't find me attractive. It's a rather valid reason."
There's a moment of silence. I watch him chew on a new piece of gum when, in reality, his mind is probably chewing on many thoughts, deciding which one to let out.
"Okay," he finally speaks. "Back then, I... I guess I didn't see you like that."
"Like what?" My insecurities make me push the subject, and, almost immediately, those same insecurities make me want to run away from there as quickly as possible. So, as it is my modus operandi, I make a joke. "You are telling me, you don't desire all of this?"
My hands run down my body in the sexiest way I can muster while being gross at the same time. My leg goes up in the air, as high as it can go without previous warm up. One of my hands finds my crotch and just then I remember I'm not tucked. The surprise is pleasant but, again, I am no stranger to pleasure.
He's laughing softly next to me. He knows I'm joking, nonetheless, not even deep down, but skin deep, I can see he also has a bunch of 'what if's going through his mind. And like the anarchist that I am, I wanna see how far I can go with this.
I direct my leg to go down and land across his lap, with an easy jump I find myself straddling him. Our faces are inches apart. I look deep into his eyes and, amongst the obvious shock and confusion, I can almost say I see something close to lust.
"So..." I try to speak, my breath getting caught in my throat. "About that kiss?"
The question is left hanging in the air for less than a second because, soon after, my eyes close by themselves as his lips crash against mine.
