It's been about a week and I haven't seen one person I haven't what outside I just can't figure out like what's wrong with me like am I cursed or something
My phone has been ringing and dinging off the chain be i don't care
"Cam I need you now more than ever please talk to me like why you have to leave me black bro it didn't have to be this way" i cried " bro please come back like I Hate My Life like I really don't want to be here anymore"
I shook my head
" fuck you bro you just like you dumbass sister you both left me fuck you" i yelled
I started crying and i got up and went to the bathroom and broke one of my razors and took the razor out I sliced my arm
I know you're like why you doing this but it distracts me from my actual pain I read that it's hurt to my heart hurt I rather my wrist hurt then my heart hurt
I whinced and pain and did it again
Somebody knocked on the door so i put my razer in my medicine cabinet and threw on a hoodie and walked down the step to open it
"Hey Nya" Malik said and i hugged him and they all said hey
"Why y'all here" i asked annoyed
" we just wanted to check on you because we know you hurt" Jai said
" bye who... you or maybe you or you" i point at Jai and then Devon and the Niyah " y'all can check on me about me being hurt when you're the motherfukers that's hurting me" i stood up
" we didn't mean to hurt you it's just how things turned out it was never meant to hurt you" Devon said
" yeah a'ight or was it didnt you cheat on me because I didn't want to actually be in a relationship with you and then you cheated on me with an ex for a reason oh yeah I know you didn't you sleep with my ex that tried to kill me multiple occasions right just because you were so called in love with me" i said sarcastically " the only person in in this room right now that didn't hurt me is Malik I hurt myself by surrounding myself with people that I thought I could trust and depend on I might not show I care but I do I don't want to care that's why I don't show it maybe if I said to myself enough it won't come true but I can't help it I'm human y'all like to say I'm so cold hearted the way you treat me is cold-hearted if that's why I am the way I am your of the Prime examples as of why I am the way I am oh y'all going to leave me or y'all going to do me wrong guess what my brother left me my sister left me guess what that's on me now I am not leaving my brothers and sisters I don't care though cuz all you guyd do is think about yourself but I'm the cold-hearted one y'all want cold-hearted imma give you a cold hearted so let me speak facts for a second"
" so I'mma start with you" i pointed at Aniyah and she got nervous " well Malik I love you but she cheated on you she slept with my ex that used to beat me on what Christmas last year she actually had a threesome with that girl that came up to us on the beach so I just wanted to get that off of my chest I know I'm so cold-hearted so you know I don't need no extra pressure on my chest and now to you" i pointed Jai
" listen this is very unnecessary we came to check on you we did not come for you to beat us down and tear us apart we just want to help" she said
"Nope..." I laughed " I don't care what y'all think y'all came to do now I'm going to help you you're so listen closely I think you're disgusting yes I said I think you are disgusting you are pregnant by another man that you met in the club which was your ex that you say you left him do you want me to say why" I asked sarcastically
" please don't do this to me"
" no cuz you did this to me you ruined my whole world I loved you I really did I did love you I'm not going to say that I didn't because I did you know what I'm saying but anyways back to what I was saying you say you love him because he had what" she shook her head " say it or I'm going to say it"
"Aids" she mumbles
" oh yes AIDS the big A. I. D. S that's why I didn't get back with you you told me you left him cuz he slept with somebody and got AIDS and when he told you you left him because you thought it was so disgusting but you raw dogged him now you pregnant now I know cuz you're nasty hoe I know Devon probably got it" i looked at her in disgust and tears started to fall from her eye and she looked at devon and he was in shock "oh i didn't forget you" i pointed at devon
" I was so in love with you I thought that was the best 6 months of my life I loved you more than I love her but since I wasn't ready for a relationship even though we act like we was in a relationship just with no title you decided to go get one from my ex my fucking EX you disgust me I just sit around here and act like I'm happy I sit around yall cuz I don't want nothing to change cuz I don't want to meet new people cuz they are going to end up like you and I don't need that I don't need it at all but I rather be by myself and learn to be by myself and be happy while I'm by myself to sit around a whole bunch of fake motherfukers who don't give a fuck about me " i laughed " why would you even go out with her knowing she was pregnant what you want to kid that's what you want you wanted a kid it all makes sense now so since you wonder the key you want to go take care of somebody else kid cuz you know her baby daddy is going to be a deadbeat she probably haven't even told him cuz she don't know where he at Solon one-time of the club and dropped her panties imagine when she see him again she's going to do it again and I can promise you that" i laughed
" please stop like you don't have to hurt us cuz you hurt we apologize for the things that we did but you're saying some things that you cannot take back and I suggest you stop before you go any further we love you we just want to help you we understand that you are hurting right now but please do not do this" Jai said
" you don't care if I'm hurting only thing you care about is leaving from this big-ass house going to clubs and my nice ass car I don't care about the money you care about the looks don't care about what I can provide for you what I can give you you don't care about me as a person why I think you're always in my house Snapchating ready to have a party.... y'all know if y'all lose me and I stopped hanging around y'all y'all won't be able to do that no more we all go to the club y'all won't be able to get in VIP we all go anywhere that needs a plane you won't get private you'll have to ride on a regular plane you know if I go to a restaurant you're going to have to pay I peep everything I see everything I just don't say nothing I can't trust y'all and I know that but don't sit here and act like you care about me if y'all cared about me y'all wouldn't do me as dirty as your did y'all want me to believe I'm so cold hearted look what yall do to me why do you think I foldwhen I start loving somebody I fold man and.... fuch y'all get out my house" i went upstair and popped two night quils and went to sleep
