Over and Beyond: Drowning(#2)

Chapter 18

Author's note: hey guys! Sorry for the late post, I am so sorry. My only excuse is the lack of stable electricity in my country. In any case here is the next chapter. Please vote if you like it : )

Also we are three more chapters to the end.

Chapter 18

The first thing I see when my eyes open is P'Arthit. I sighed. It's only fitting. He is the man who consumes all my thoughts, the man I can't live without. The day I wake up he should be the one I see, he is the only one I want to see.

I knew I have been unconscious for a while. I remember the voices of my parents, P'Arthit and others and a little bit of what they talked about.

I would have smiled when P'Arthit finally noticed that I was awake and staring at him but a long time asleep has made my face frozen He made a sound of joy and nearly hugged me. He called my name over and over, and my mother came in followed by my father and soon the room was filled with my family and a doctor.

They told me I have been unconscious for nearly four months. They filled me in on everything that has been happening, that Anya's father had been tried and found guilty of assault and attempted murder. My father pulled some strings to make sure he gets a sentence. He would not be disturbing us again.

Pete too came to see me and told me about how P'Arthit really loves me and that he didn't stand a chance. I don't stand a chance either, I was thinking while he talked. When P'Arthit finds out the truth, he would leave me.

Anya has come to see me, she was obviously pregnant now and she wore it like a stamp. I couldn't even hate her the more I tried. When I saw her pregnant and heavy with my child, I turned a blind eye to her actions and acted like I have forgiven her for telling her father about Pete and P'Arthit. When I saw those two kissing I let it slip by accident to Anya and she must have let it known to her father. I only now know that Pete was actually Anya's brother.

Every day for a week P'Arthit came to visit me. I wanted to see him but I often wished he wouldn't come, because if I keep seeing him doing his best for me, taking care of me, I feel worse. I feel guilt like a hold on my throat choking me.

I knew I had to tell him, that I should have told him before things became like this. At the party I had gone there to right my mistake when P'Arthit walked outside the party. I followed him in an effort to get him alone but then I saw him being held at gun point by Anya's insane father. Everything else that followed happened so fast, I could barely remember.

When I was near death, the one thing I regretted was my betrayal of P'Arthit, of how I have hurt him. The only thing I wished for was to tell him myself. I didn't want someone else to tell him and paint it all in the light of their opinions and what they think they know. I know that P'Arthit wouldn't want me anymore even if I was the one to tell him, still I wanted to be the one to say it.

But each day passed by and I was still unable to say a word to him, until I decided within myself that it had to be today.

"P'Arthit," I said and he looked up. He was sitting next to my bed peeling a tangerine. The citrusy smell wafted to my nose and I turned teary a bit, but I pulled my face back together again.

"What's wrong Kongpob?" he stopped his work and held my gaze.

I smiled at him, capturing his face in my heart and feeling it squeeze painfully close. I have to close my heart to the pain about to come. "You know I love you, right?" I winced internally. That was just typically me trying to soften him and make him pity me. I shouldn't be pitied; I deserved the rawness of his anger and ... even his hatred.