Lonely Together II (Sequel)

Chapter 2

"I need you to sign these, just clarifying your legal rights."

I didn't know what I was doing. I needed Sharon to help me with these things. I didn't know a thing about law, and it was her profession.

"Can we just, hold off on this?" I tried to focus. "I'm not concentrated enough."

I needed help. I needed defense... I needed my mom.

She frowned. "This needs to be done as soon as possible."

"I just don't want to mess anything up," I put my head in my hands. "I mess everything up." I whispered more to myself.

She exhaled and closed the file, scooted back in her chair. "You obviously need some," she paused, trying to find the right word. "Closure. Call me when you can do this, okay?"

Closure. Hadn't heard that one in awhile.

"Sure thing," I stood. "Thank you."

She left, as did I. I was hopeless; alone. And by alone, I literally mean alone. I had lost anyone who actually gave a damn about me.

I still was in denial. Hell, I would be in denial for the rest of my entire life. It's been two days and I still have this feeling that every time I walk into my house, I would be greeted with Justin's kisses and comforting words. Those were things I would never get to experience ever again.

The sad part is, I loved him so much. I still love him. I loved him more than I loved myself, I loved him more than life. I should be dead, not Justin.

That's another thing. I seem to be the only one to think that this is all my fault, but that's because it is. If Justin would've never moved here, he would've been safe, and happier than ever.

But I guess that's what I do to people. I reel them in just to get them hurt, and that's something that I don't think could ever change.

It's hard for me to remember when my life started to go downhill. Even without a mom, I was the happiest kid alive. I had a bad foster family, but I had great friends. I had the girls at the shop, and we would always be at the beach. I didn't think about life as much as I do now. I would make the best out of every situation, and now it feels like if I actually get out of bed then I've accomplished something.

I walked into the shop, tossing my purse on a chair in the back room. I grabbed the back of the chair and hung my head, turning it to the side as I stretched my neck slightly. I was so tired.

"Hey, Jess." Jamie came over and placed her hand on my back, looking at me from behind. "How are you feeling?"

I stood tall now, taking a deep breath. "Awful." My voice cracked.

She frowned, giving me a big hug. It's been so long since anyone's shown some compassion. Ever since Justin died I hadn't had one person hug me, or tell me everything's going to be okay. All I've been told was to sign papers and move on.

"He did it for you, Jess."

"I didn't want him to," I whispered. "God, I didn't want him to."

She just nodded, staring off into space for a few moments. I didn't know what to say, it felt like all I could do was cry. This was also embarrassing. I can't remember the last time anyone of these girls has seen me cry.

"Life's so different," I said suddenly, not even really meaning to. "Without him, I mean. I just can't focus."

"Jamie, where are those shorts?" Kelsey called, sounded a little irritated.

Jamie grabbed the shorts. "Why don't you take the day off, Jess. You don't need to-"

"No way," I grabbed my name tag. "It's been too long."