Blanket Of Stars | jensoo

hell and back pt 2

"Baby, I can't see you," Jennie says to me. I would say she was crying again but I don't believe she ever stopped.

I shake my head negatively. "Yes, you can."

"I can't," she reiterates.

"Yes, you can," I reply, firmer than the last time.

"No I can't!" she yells at me. "God." Her voice softens when she says, "I can't see you."

I sit up and push myself against the cupboard, afraid to move closer to Jennie in case I somehow make it worse. I wonder if it could possibly get any worse. "I'm still here. I'm not going anywhere," I tell her insistently, for both our benefits.

"You are."

"I'm not."

"It's getting worse, Jisoo. When I touch you...I can barely pull away. And it's just getting harder. I can't stop touching you and you're fading away right in front of me."

"Don't say it like that."

"Why not?" She shrugs. "It's the truth, isn't it?"

"No," I stumble over my single-word reply.

"We're back to square one. It's nice to meet you, Casper," she says sardonically.

I frown at her choice of words. "Don't call me that. Just, shut up. I need to think." She called me baby, I realise. "You called me baby."

"I remember."

I lean my head back against the cupboard door and sigh heavily. I feel like shaking my fist to the gods and asking them why they keep doing this to me. Haven't I paid enough?

"Where are you?" she asks me quietly.

"I'm where you were sitting when we got home yesterday. In the corner." I lean forward a little, opening and closing the door, showing her exactly where I am.

She sits down a good distance from me and echoes my sigh. "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know yet." I answer truthfully. I just have to think for a second.

"There has to be something. This can't just happen...not to us."

I agree whole-heartedly. "There's got be a way."

I watch as her eyes close and her lips move. "I don't know what to do, Jisoo. I really don't know what to do anymore."

"Last night didn't just mean nothing, Jennie. We just have to be patient like you told me."

"Last night is what did this, Jisoo," she raises her voice, not quite yelling. "When we were stupid and got carried away."

"We weren't stupid."

She's disbelieving. "We weren't? I can't see you and we weren't stupid?"

"I still wouldn't take it back."

"That's exactly why we're stupid. Because I wouldn't either and because even though I heard you screaming in pain, all I still want to do is kiss you. All I ever want to do is kiss you."

I need to think. There has to be a solution. There's always a solution. My voice is gentle when I say, "Go back to bed, Jennie."

She turns to look at me and she's almost looking at my eyes. Hers are wide in disbelief. "Are you kidding me?"

"I need to think. You're not helping."

"You honestly think I could sleep right now?"

I study her tired face. "You're exhausted. Don't even tell me you're not."