[s10 my dudes! Mini spoiler alert.]
“Please,” Cas pleaded, eyes heavy with hurt, “I’m begging you.”
The figure in front of him merely chuckled, casually twirling a knife in his hand. “Are you?” Dean drawled, deep voice rich with amusement. “If you were begging, you’d be on your knees.”
The angel stopped short of another argument, speechless as to what he was hearing. Oh, hell. He slouched in defeat, orange flames licking at the frayed ends of his coat. What was he doing here? Was there anything he could do? Was there any part of the old Dean left, or had it all been consumed by the mark?
Cas had hoped that there was something left, some sliver of humanity that he could recover in a desperate attempt to get the person he loved back. But now, hearing the malice, the sickening hunger for surrender that came from the demon that was Dean, he couldn’t be too sure.
“What?” Cas croaked in disbelief, unsure of how to react. He had planned to merely try and talk to Dean, reason with him, but had somehow ended up the victim of a carefully drawn circle of holy oil. Dean had been quick to light it.
“I said,” Dean growled, his darkened eyes skimming the angel’s figure. “If you were really begging, you’d be on your knees.”
Cas stopped, eyes intent on the man in front of him. “You’re sick, Dean. You’re not in your right mind.”
Dean laughed, throwing his head back. “Pretty boy angel finally gets it.”
“Are you even hearing yourself? Can’t you see what you’ve become?”
Dean paused, stopping interestingly just along the rim of the circle. Crossing his arms, he ran his thumb along his bottom lip, matching his own defiance with the angel’s. “What I’ve become?” He repeated insistently. “The Dean you know is dead. The Dean you can’t seem to let go of no matter how pathetic your attempts are is gone. You think you can convince me otherwise? You think you can just talk me out of this?”
“I know I can.” The angel replied, determination blazing with the fire in his eyes.
“I know I can,” Dean mocked cruelly, continuing to circle the pitiful angel. “Like I said,” His mouth twitched in a snarl. “Knees.”
Eyes wide in fear, Cas took a step back in defeat. What was he doing? Why had he come here in some half-assed attempt to find the Dean he had lost? Maybe he was right, whether it was the mark talking or not; his attempts at saving the man he shamelessly loved were pathetic.
Still, he had to try.
He fell to his knees.
Dean stopped for a moment, a glimmer of surprise flashing across his face. He recovered without missing a beat. “That’s more like it.” A satisfied smirk curled across his face.
“You’re wrong,” Cas started. “I know that Dean’s still in there. I know that he can fight this.”
“Don’t you get it, Cassie?” Dean drawled. “It was always this. This was always the Dean you knew.” Reaching over the flames, the monster cupped Cas’ cheek amusingly. “Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t see the same evil you’ve been clinging to for years.”
Cas’ cheek burned in ache where Dean’s skin touched his. It felt like eons since he had just touched Dean, and not out of anger, restraint, or aggression. From his knees, he stared up into the eyes of Dean Winchester, and watched as the bright, emerald green faded slowly into a suffocating black…
~
“Cas!”
Cas jolted back into consciousness, the dim lights of the bunker a somewhat welcoming sight. He glanced frantically around, eyes falling down to the blood soaking his front.
“Cas, hey bud. You okay?”
The angel looked up at Dean, fear melting away as soon as he laid eyes on his apple green eyes. He sighed audibly, shaking the nightmarish flashback away.
“What happened?”
“There was a fight, on the hunt,” Dean explained carefully. “Demon knocked you out pretty good.”
“Oh. Oh, right.”
“Are you okay?” Dean asked fearfully. “You were kind of shaking, muttering when you were unconscious.”
“No, yes, I’m-I’m fine.” Cas said, shaking the last of his daze away.
“Okay.”
“Dean” Cas added, unable to help himself. “you don’t...you don’t remember anything from when you were a demon, do you?”
Dean frowned. “Just a snippet here and there. Why?”
