All The Little Pieces

The Evening Garden

Author's Note: This chapter contains sexual content. Please be advised prior to reading, if this topic makes you uncomfortable.

Loki guided Elizabeth by the elbow to a flight of stairs descending into the garden. "Be careful," he said as they reached the bottom. "The ground is a bit uneven here."

Everything was rosy gold in the light of the setting sun. The sounds of the party behind faded to a murmur. They walked through the garden until they reached an alcove set into the wall and sat on the bench at the back.

For several moments, neither spoke. Elizabeth wiped furiously at the tears on her cheeks. She felt Loki's fingers brush hers, then curl around her hand. After another small sob escaped, Loki pulled her close and stroked her back.

"Please don't cry," he whispered against her hair. "I'm so sorry. Please, it kills me to know I've hurt you."

Elizabeth drew a long, quavering breath. "I'm crying because I should have told you outright that I didn't want to leave, and I put you through the same thing. And I'm trying not to be angry with you." She rubbed fresh tears away. "And because I'm overwhelmed with everything hitting me at once." She snorted. "I hate emotions hitting me. I'd rather think them through logically. Half an hour ago, I was trying to convince myself I could get through dinner pretending that I was fine with us being done. Now I find out we're not, and I don't know if I should punch you or cry or kiss you." She blew out a shaky breath slowly.

"Why didn't you just tell me you didn't want to go?" Loki asked. "All you had to do was tell me. I want you to tell me everything."

"Every relationship I've had has ended pretty much the same way. I didn't want to be pathetic and fall apart or guilt you into being with me. I really thought you were telling me you didn't want me anymore, and I wasn't going to beg you." She fell silent for a moment, then stared at the ground in embarrassment. "I've never cared about anyone like I do you. It's weird for me."

He nodded. "I know. I feel the same. I missed you so much, but I though you wanted to forget me and get back to Midgard. And then yesterday..." he paused. "You told me to stop caring about you, and, and—" Loki's voice cracked, and he drew a deep breath.

"I shouldn't have said that, or yelled at you," she said quietly. "I thought you were complaining about some lingering attachment you had...that you had moved past me already, and I felt like...I don't know, everything was breaking apart. I didn't react very well."

He rested his head in his hands. "I'm so terribly sorry. Heartbreak is the last thing I wanted for you. I would never try to hurt you." Loki lifted his head and looked at her. "I've never felt physical pain because of losing someone before, but the last few days, my chest actually hurt all the time, and eating made me sick."

Elizabeth sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. "If this is going to work, we have to get better at talking about us, not guessing what we're thinking. I...it's something I have to work on. I'm not good at expressing emotions with words, unless I'm angry."

Loki shook his head ruefully. "Nor I. I hide them under a laugh or a prank. Ask my brother sometime." He reached for her and kissed her gently, then settled his arms around her. "I'm sorry I've hurt you and made a mess of us. Will you forgive me and let me try again?"

Elizabeth nodded against him. "Of course. I'm sorry too, I'm just as much at fault. Forgive me too?"

"Always." They sat for a minute gazing out into the growing dusk of the garden. "Should we head back?"

"Not yet," murmured Loki. "We still have quite a bit of time until dinner. Let me hold you and kiss you for a while. I missed you so much, I'm not sharing you with anyone yet."

Elizabeth stroked his cheek and pulled his face toward her. "In that case..." She brushed her lips over his softly.

"Oh no, I have five days of not kissing you to make up for." He kissed her insistently, his tongue darting between her lips and tangling with hers. When she pulled back for air, he caressed her face, running his fingers along her jaw and trailing them over her lips. Elizabeth caught one finger between her teeth and circled it with her tongue, smiling impishly at his sharp intake of breath.

"You have to stop that if we're going to be on time for dinner."

"Oh?" She couldn't keep the pleased chuckle out of her voice at his reaction. "You like that so much?" Elizabeth ran her palm up the inside of his thigh and nibbled his earlobe. "Is this better?" Her fingers skimmed the front of his pants, and she heard him catch his breath again.

He turned his face toward hers until their lips were almost touching. "Do you not want to get to dinner at all? If you keep that up, I promise you, I won't be able to—"

Elizabeth reached under the bottom edge of Loki's breastplate. She pulled his belt through the buckle and slowly undid the laces of his trousers.

"I thought you didn't want to do this outside," Loki breathed. "Last week..." His words died away as her fingers brushed against him.

Elizabeth slid to her knees of the stone pavement. She gazed up with wide, innocent eyes as she eased him out of the snug leather. "I mean, I can stop, if you want."

"No, I...you—"

"Shhhhh." She straightened to lay a finger on his lips. "Don't talk." Her smile became devious and she ran her nails gently along him, eliciting a soft groan. "In fact, like you said, we're outside. You probably shouldn't make any noise at all."

Elizabeth lowered her head and ran her mouth along the path her nails had just travelled. She touched him lightly, a brush of the lips here, a flick of the tongue there. He reached out and gripped her by the shoulders, his palms slick with sweat.

She continued to tease and barely touch, drawing out each tiny sensation for him, until his trembling hands began clenching tightly around her shoulders. Elizabeth wrapped her hand firmly around him and let her tongue linger as she slid it along his length. When she pulled her lips away for a moment, his whole body tensed and jerked forward. "Oh gods, please," he whispered.

Elizabeth leaned forward and finally took him all in. Loki's hands twisted in her hair, pulling her tight against him. She could feel his legs shaking on either side of her and hear his breath coming in rough gasps. His hips tensed and then shuddered uncontrollably. She sucked him in even more deeply as he threw back his head and groaned loudly with pleasure and release.

After another moment or two, she sat back slowly on her heels and pulled herself up on the bench beside him. Loki put his arm around her and rested his head on her shoulder, still breathing hard. After a few minutes, his breath slowed to a normal rate.

"I missed you," he murmured, "and I don't mean because of that. Having you by me...when you weren't there, I felt like part of me was gone." He shook his head. "I sound ridiculous, I know."

Elizabeth smiled. "No, you don't. It was the same for me. Like a chunk of me was ripped away, and I didn't know how to handle it. Every other time—" She stopped awkwardly.

Loki looked at her with troubled eyes. "I've never experienced this. I'm sorry you have. I can't imagine more than once."

She sighed. "It's okay. Like I said, I've never cared about someone the way I do you. It was never that bad in the past." She held up a hand as he opened his mouth. "It's all right. I learned how much I care about you. I had lots of time in my room to think and analyze. I want to be here with you. I'm not going back to Midgard."

Loki swept her into an embrace and held her for a long time. Finally, he released her and stood up, fastening his belt and rearranging his clothes. Elizabeth brushed off her skirt and ran her hands over her hair.

"Ready?" He offered her his arm.

"Whenever you are." She tucked her fingers into the crook of his elbow.

They walked together out into the dark of the garden and made their way to the stairs and the banquet.