questions that keep me awake at night

Aunty Charlie

There's one person in my family I will never question.

My love for her will never waver, just as she will never waver. 

That person is my Aunty Charlie. 

When I felt so alone. Lower than I'd ever sunk before, she was the one who saw that something was wrong with me and told me three things- she loves me. I'm worth it. And out of all the angels in her life; I'm the one she loves the most. 

She carried me through hell and back and she is the one who knows me, and who sees me. 

And so isn't it just the fucking way of the world that she has a terminal illness. 

And isn't it just the most horrible thing to wander to the office and find out there's a call letting me know that she fell in her yard and is now on support to breathe, eat, drink, keep her heart pumping and that means she is currently on life support. 

God. Fucking. Dammit.