Eksaktong anim na buwan na ang lumipas simula nang huli nating pag-uusap. Parang kailan lang noong nagkaroon na rin tayo ng closure pero ibang-iba na ako ngayon.
Maliwanag na ang mga ngiti.
May ningnging na ang mga mata.
Unti-unti nang nagiging masaya.
Sumilay ang ngiti sa mga labi ko nang makita kita ulit dito sa paborito kong coffee shop. Alam mo bang gusto kong bumalik dito noon pero hindi ko magawa dahil baka makita kita? Pero heto tayo ngayon . . .
Pareho nang may kasamang iba.
"In fairness, ha, ang blooming mo ngayon," my workmate said.
I just smiled while sipping from my cup of coffee.
"May namumuo na bang love life?" she teased.
"Wala," sagot ko naman. "Masaya lang dahil natapos ko na ang tatlong progress reports natin."
"Ang sipag talaga!"
We talked about a lot of things, including her lovelife. When she asked me about mine, I just smiled. You remained a secret of mine even though I had already gotten over you. Maybe the only person who knew about us was that guy.
Okay na, sabi ko sa sarili ko. Tanggap ko na lahat ng nangyari. I had feelings for you. I got hurt. I moved on. Now, I could sincerely say I'm glad that you found the right woman for you.
I stole a glance at the direction you used to sit at and it brought a lot of memories. Ngayon, wala nang pagsisisi sa loob ko dahil alam kong hindi talaga tayo ang para sa isa't isa at pareho na tayong nakatingin sa sari-sarili nating hinaharap.
"Sige, mauna na ako. Unlike you, may dalawa pa akong reports na kailangang tapusin," sabi niya kaya tumango ako sa kanya.
"Okay. Maya-maya pa ako babalik. Bye!"
Lumabas siya ng cafe at naiwan akong mag-isa sa table. I was leisurely enjoying my cup of coffee when I suddenly heard a familiar voice at the counter.
"One cappuccino, please."
Lumingon ako at saktong nagkatama ang tingin namin sa isa't isa.
"Ah! Miss!"
Umupo siya sa harapan ko at ngumiti naman ako sa kanya.
"It's been a while," I greeted.
"Yeah. Kumusta?"
"Okay na."
"Ah. You can stay afloat now," he commented.
"Yup."
"Good for you, then."
We remained silent for a few seconds. Ang tagal na rin kasi simula noong huli kaming nagkita. Hindi na ako pumunta sa mga cafe rito simula noong araw na 'yon. Nagkaroon din kami ng business trip sa US for a few weeks at nag-stay ako ro'n ng isang buwan para magbakasyon.
"Ah. May utang pa pala akong coffee sa'yo," sabi ko nang maalala ko ang ginawa niya dati.
"Sayang, nabayaran ko na 'yong order ko," sagot niya naman sabay tawa.
"How about tomorrow?" tanong ko.
Malaki ang utang na loob ko sa kanya at gusto kong suklian 'yon sa parehong paraan na ginawa niya noon para mapangiti ako.
"I won't be around here for a week starting tomorrow. May lakad kasi kami sa office."
"Oh, I see."
"Next week? Pwede ka?" tanong niya kaya napatingin ako sa kanya.
"Uhm, yeah."
"Okay, then, I'll look forward for my free coffee next week," he said, smiling. "Ah, oo nga pala. Ang tagal na nating nag-uusap pero hindi ko pa rin alam ang pangalan mo."
Right. Gusto ko ring itanong sa kanya dati pero nahihiya ako. I was close to asking the barista but I decided not to because I knew he'd just tease me just like the last time.
"I'm Aloysius, by the way," he said while extending his hand.
Inabot ko naman 'yon at sinabi ko rin ang pangalan ko. It felt weird because I only described him as coffee guy or smiley guy in my mind but his name was kind of unique.
"You have an unforgettable name," I commented.
"You, too."
Kinuha naman niya ang order sa counter at doon na nag-stay sa table ko.
Muli akong napatingin sa pinto nang narinig ko 'yong bumukas at sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon ay nakita kita kasama siya.
We looked at each other and nodded. But this time, I didn't feel any regrets and heaviness anymore. It was just pure nostalgia. I just missed the memories, not you.
Because I finally ended our something.
Because I was finally done waiting.
Because I finally crossed the line.
Hanggang isang araw, natanggap ko na ang lahat. At doon nagtapos ang ating kwento . . . isang kwentong hindi talaga itinadhanang magsimula, kaya winakasan ng tadhana.
I was still not sure if what I felt for you was love, but you were special. Maybe it was close to love. Maybe it was, indeed, love. I have no idea. But one thing is for sure:
You are my truth. My lesson. My faded scar.
"Hey, I need to go," Aloysius said.
"Oh. Okay. Bye bye," I replied.
"So, see you next week?" pahabol niya.
I grinned at him. "Yeah. See you."
And this is our ending, as well as my beginning.
Finally closing this journal,
Wilhelmina.
--- E N D ---
author's note:
Almost's chapter in her book is finally done. I will be writing another epistolary connected to this entitled, Hi, Coffee Guy.
Thank you for supporting Dear Almost!
Thankful,
Ann.
Oops! Ang larawang ito ay hindi sumusunod sa aming mga alituntunin sa nilalaman. Upang magpatuloy sa pag-publish, subukan itong alisin o mag-upload ng bago.
