|Saerans pov|
I hated myself I hate that I act out and make y/ns life miserable and sad why is she even with me? I also hate that I'm not a better husband or father I wish I was but I'm not I'm a terrible one
Saeyoung walks in and sees me deep in thought
"You ok?"
"No why did y/n even marry me? I don't deserve a girl like her." I say and Saeyoung sighs
"You do deserve her but your not allowing people to help you when you've been through so much and look Rika lied and manipulated you and you won't go and seek professional help so it's gonna take longer for you to get better." Saeyoung says and I just nod
"I know but she's always so nice to me I'm surprised she hasn't left me yet and if she did leave me I wouldn't blame her if I was her I would have left because no one should be with me." I say putting my hands on my head as tears welled up in my eyes
"Please saeran you need help."
"I don't want any fucking help from doctors!" I yell as tears were streaming down my face I couldn't help but cry I'm the worst husband and father in the world and I want to change but it's so hard
"Saeran remember when you found out y/n was pregnant with Pearl?" Saeyoung asks and I nod of course I do
"Yeah of course I found the positive pregnancy test In the garbage in the washroom and I got super depressed and scared that I ran out of the house and y/n stayed up all night waiting for me." I say and saeyoung nods
"Yeah you called me up and told me everything as you were crying you said your scared about starting a family with y/n and she's better off with someone who won't make her cry all the time." Saeyoung says and truth is I still feel like that I feel like I don't deserve y/n
"I still feel like she's better off without me in her life."
"But that's not true y/n saved you and brought you back from mint eye she could have left you there but she didn't she saved you and never gave up on you no matter what was thrown at her." Saeyoung says and I smile slightly remembering all the good times I've had with y/n
*I want to be better for y/n but I don't want to go and see doctors who will give me medications and then send me to therapy I'm always gonna be broken and no medication will help me*
YOU ARE READING
Life as Saerans wife
FanfictionBeing married to saeran has never been easy it's difficult mostly because you both fight a lot and after you both fight he leaves and stays with his brother for days or weeks but even if you both fight you both love each other more then anything
