Almost A Decade // Ryden

Chapter Four.

     I park at a meter and get out, heading over to where the sidewalk meets the sand. I shake my head quick trying to shake my thoughts loose, this was too familiar. Ryan left me on a beach in Capetown. Crying, screaming, literally on my fucking knees, begging him not to go .... he left.

     "Hey. Nice Tesla, Mr. Bigshot." I turn around, and Ryan is standing there, hands in pockets, smiling.

     "Yeah, thanks." I tapped the button to lock it, and started following him. He was already a few steps out into the sand. I can tell he's been here before, he's walking with determination. We haven't said a word to each other this whole walk. Only thing you can hear are the waves crashing against the shore, and the faint sound of a car every couple of minutes passing on the street.

     "Here." Ryan points to ....a place in the sand? I just stand there for a moment. "What? You're too good to sit on the ground now?"

     "No." I say, while kind of saying yes. My jeans are expensive. Sand is dirty. I also don't want any to get in my car.... but Ryan is already sitting, so I just join him anyway. "What are we doing here?"

     Ryan is quiet. It's as if he didn't hear me, which is impossible. But he's just ... staring out into the ocean. The moon is bright, so I can see all the lines in his face. His perfectly shaped face. His hair is blowing in the breeze, and his eyes are fixed on the water. Ive never found a man who's looked as beautiful to me as Ryan, and sitting right here ... I don't think I ever will.

    "Stop staring." He says, his smirk growing wide. "You're going to burn a hole through my skull.

    "I wasn't staring, I was waiting for a response." I hissed out, still staring at his cheeky smirk. I lean back, crossing my legs out in front of me, scanning the ocean to find whatever he was looking at.

     After, what felt like 30 minutes, Ryan finally finds his voice. "I don't know. I don't know what we're doing here."

    Sick response dude. I stay quiet, sort of pissed off at his reply, but enjoying just being next to him.

     "I guess .... just seeing you every few years wasn't enough for me anymore. I'm sick of the stupid conversations we have. Brendon..." He turns and looks at me, "You were my best friend."
    
     My shaking foot stilled, and I was just staring at him. Do I agree with him? Do I tell him those little conversations were enough to drive me insane? Or do I not give him that satisfaction?

     "I mean.... " he starts to stumble around his words. "You don't have to say anything, I just appreciate you coming here with me."

     Sarah.

     "I'm sorry, but I have to get home before Sarah finds out I'm not in my studio." I stand up quickly, brushing the sand off of me. Ryan gets up, too, mimicking the same movements as me.

     "Yeah. I'm sure Z has sent me 100 texts wondering where I am." We head back, our walking is slow though. We were both holding onto these last few minutes with each other.

     Back at my car, Ryan is just standing there as I go to unlock my door.

     "B?"

     "Yeah?" I turn towards Ryan expecting him to still be on the sidewalk, but he was right next to me. He just reaches around me, and pulls me into a tight hug.

     "Thanks Ry." I couldn't believe Ryan and I were actually .... hugging.

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    I wake up the next morning, giddy as hell. Not much happened with Ryan, but I was extremely happy. Sarah was already fist deep into my sweats before pulling them off me. I felt her lips wrap around me... I lean my head back and closed my eyes .... "Ryan....."