Our Contract of Distrust

-- 26 --

Breakfast is silent and tense, as in earlier days.

Maybe he thinks I'll revert to trying to kill him.

But I no longer wish for that.

I'm not even sure I still wish to escape from here. It seems easier to stay. In a weird way, I've gotten used to the tension, so that now if all was at peace I might not know how to react.

But would leaving here even guarantee peace?

Should I apologise?

A part of me wants to. He meant well after all. But another part of me still wants to hurl a plate at the wall.

Headcho and his goons would be waiting for me today.

People didn't take sick leave at the factory. Not unless you were coughing up blood or threatening to introduce an epidemic.

Things must operate differently in Feodor's world.

He must be treated as if he were human.

Despite the adverse setback, Feodor still drives me to the factory.

It's almost weird that we can function so normally despite it all. The conflict hasn't actually been resolved after all.

But I've always been the type who needs time to come to terms with my own thoughts before moving past a problem, so it works well that he doesn't push the issue.

"Nadia!" Milly practically tackles me as I enter the locker room. "Are you okay? I was so worried!"

Annamia enters my line of sight nodding. "You've never missed a day before."

"It just happened that way," I say, "I'm fine."

Cassidy looks me up and down sceptically. "Come," she beckons. She tests my temperature with the back of her hand. "You sure you didn't have a bad reaction to that vaccination? Quite a few have been out from it."

"Really? It wasn't just me?"

Annamia shakes her head. "There's talk of follow-up tests in a month or so."

"For- for the ones who missed work?" Please no.

Cassidy shrugs. "They haven't said yet."

Annamia shakes her apron out with more force than necessary. "Who knows what those bastards are thinking. Or what the hell is in those so-called vaccines."

Cassidy slaps Annamia's arm lightly and tilts her head in Milly's direction. "Language."

Annamia rolls her eyes. "Terribly sorry."

Milly rolls her eyes as well. "Anyway, it seems a bunch are still missing."

"Missing is such an ominous word." Annamia says.

Milly rolls her eyes again. "Absent then."

There's a lot of eye-rolling going on this morning.

Making it onto a follow-up test list was the last thing I wanted, but maybe Headcho won't have noticed my absence what with how prevalent it seems to be.

I tighten the apron at my back and head into the factory with my head down.

"Whadaya know, the damsel has returned," one of Headcho's henchmen calls out.

Keep walking. Keep walking. It could be about anyone.

"Sonia!" Headcho intercepts my path.

It seems my hopes were in vain.

I can think of few things worse than seeing his face, but I force myself to dip my head in greeting regardless.

"Found yourself a sweet one, ey?"

I don't have a clue what he's talking about. But I don't even want to ask. I just want this to be over with asap.

"That new hubby of yours," he continues, "did ya tell the fool to call us up and ask 'bout sick leave? Did ya think you could scrounge moneh from us or some'in?"

As if on cue, all his goons laugh at once.

"You got the wrong person," I mumble.

"Now, now, 'twas youse alright. He calls us up and says 'See here, Sonias is sick, see, can't come ta work'".

Because of course Feodor would know Headcho's ridiculous nickname for me and talk with that stupid drawl. I barely withhold myself from joining the eye-rolling bandwagon.

"Sh-she's not Sonia." The small voice ushers in a sudden quiet.

When Headcho finally speaks it's like he's spitting poison, "What?"

Peggy swallows hard and cradles my elbow. "Her... her name is... Nadia. See... nametag."

From Headcho's expression you'd think he was hearing a dung-covered bug speaking. 

"You've got the wrong person," Peggy mumbles and quickly tugs me away from Headcho's group.

Peggy, sweet, dear, foolish girl.

"Thank you," I say, "But you really shouldn't have. Headcho will have it out for you too now."

Peggy smiles up at me feebly. "It's okay. I have a rather forgettable face."

I attempt a small smile back at her.

"But how come you're only arriving now?" I ask her. Usually Peggy is fully settled in her position before I even drag myself out of the change-room.

Feeble smile makes a reappearance. "Wasn't feeling the best this morning. But hey, being late came in handy for once."

I wouldn't say having a go at Headcho really fell into the category of 'coming in handy', but if Peggy felt justified by her courageous act, who was I to say otherwise?

I attempt some sort of smile in return, but knowing my underdeveloped facial muscles, it likely fails.

Hoping never really seems to work out for me.

But all the same, I hope there won't be a round-two with Headcho.