downpour / mileven au.

twenty.

CHAPTER TWENTY;
SO FUCKING SORRY.

el released a heavy sigh, furiously erasing all of her falsely written scratch work. tomorrow was her final midterm before the students of hawkins high were released to indulge in their week-long spring break. the pretty brunette had been studying non-stop for her chemistry exam for the past two weeks, and she couldn't wait for her break to begin.

as she reread the problem, her notes were tugged out of her lap and dean's coaxing voice filled her ears, "come on, babe. you've been looking at this stuff for two hours. take a break."

she nodded. "yes, because i keep getting wrong answers. look, i have to get at least a 90 to get my grade up to a b. i need to study," she explained, annoyed by his disturbance. the blonde only shook his head, tugging her closer to him with a smirk. she went to grab her notes, but he quickly pushed them off his bed where the two teens were perched on top of. she huffed at the sight of them scattering across his bedroom floor, "ugh, dean, i-"

he hurriedly placed his lips on hers, cupping her cheek in the process. "just a little break," he mumbled against her lips, pulling her on top of him. he deepened the kiss, placing his hand on her lower back. she reluctantly gave in, crawling into his lap.

dean wasn't the worst kisser, but not the best either. an adequate median: better than troy, but inferior to the previous set of lips she'd kissed. she bit her lip when his mouth trailed from hers to her neck.

at the sensation of him trying to leave a hickey, she pulled away. "don't leave a mark, my dad will have a stroke," she whispered before leaning back into him.

he chuckled against her collarbone. "i guess i'll have to leave a mark somewhere he can't see," he replied, causing her eyes to snap open.

"what do you mean?" she quipped as his lips continued to pepper her skin.

his hands gathered the bottom her shirt, pulling it up. "trust me, babe," dean murmured.

she pressed her hands against his firm chest, leaning away. tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, she shook her head. "i-i can't," she stuttered, her mouth suddenly feeling very dry.

he quirked an eyebrow, "okay?" she removed herself from his lap to reside beside him, staring down at her hands. "are you, like, saving yourself for marriage or something?" he quizzed, his voice not judgemental but a little disappointed.

she shook her head, "no, it's not that. i just want it to be special." she also wanted to be in love -- which she isn't.

he nodded. "i get that." she smiled, relieved he understood (not that it would've changed her mind had he not). a smirk spread against his swollen lips, "i have an idea."

her neatly maintained brows scrunched, "what?"

"my family has a lake house in branwood. maybe we could go for the weekend, leave saturday and come back monday. it'll be great, just the two of us. plus, we have a boat and canoes, and you'll love feeding the ducks," he explained, seemingly oblivious to her unexcited expression. "you'll have to tell your parents that mine are going, though, okay?"

she nodded, agreeing for some reason. "yeah. i'll ask."

he smiled, caressing her jaw. "i can't wait,' he pecked her cheek. "you know i love you, right?"

no, she was not aware up until this moment. she smiled, "yeah, you, too." she allowed him to pull her in for another lingering kiss before she pulled away to get her notes, "now, let me study." he laughed with a nod, returning to his own studying.

no matter how hard she tried to focus on the words on the page, she couldn't ignore the churning feeling in her stomach that she was in the midst of making a huge mistake. she had no desire to lose her virginity to dean clark, yet she had pretended as though she did -- and for what?