UNEXPECTED ✰ COLIFER

Chapter 49 ✰ Date Night (Part 1)

Jen's pov

The truth is, none of us are easy to date, to deal with, or to please all the time. We have our vices, attitudes, and ways of doing things that make us who we are. You won't like everything about somebody. It's impossible. This is life and it isn't about living in a fairytale. It's about finding something or someone you're willing to work for. With somebody who is willing to work with you. It really is as simple as that. Find someone who has a heart for you and never stops fighting for them...

But maybe I'm different, maybe I'm a handful. Before you date me... you need to understand that I'm damaged. I get triggered easily and I have struggled with a lot lately. There are nights when I'm curled up in a ball on the floor and I won't talk to anyone. I'll just cry and I'll shut you out. I'm not going to be able to trust you for a while, because the love of my life just left me and our kids. I will need reassurance. I will need you. I will need you to keep choosing me. I will need you to care. I'm a lot and I need a lot and I'm aware of that. I just want you to know the reality before you get involved with this. Before you get involved with me and my heart. So before you think I'm always a happy person, that I'll always be smiling, and that I'll always be positive... know the reality. Don't enter my life if you can't handle it. If you can't handle me. I just don't want you to touch my heart if you aren't ready for that.

I sighed as I stared at my pale face in the mirror. It was almost time for my date with Jack and I had to hurry up to make myself look a bit decent, but the look of my reflection had stopped me for some reason. I looked tired as if I hadn't had a good night's rest for weeks, maybe even months. I sighed again while searching for my makeup. With the right makeup, my face would be fine again. The advantage of all those years as an actress was that I knew exactly how to apply my makeup on days that I looked tired or sick. After applying a few layers of foundation and sealing it with a face powder, you couldn't see the tiredness anymore. The people who knew me well could see it in my eyes, but Jack probably wouldn't be able to see it. While I started to apply my mascara I heard my phone vibrating. I looked up and smiled when I saw a message from Jack.

'I'll be there in 15 minutes. X'

I looked at my watch and was startled by the fact that I only had such a short time left. I quickly finished my make-up and put on the royal blue dress that I had bought for this date. I smiled and looked at myself in the mirror. It was the first time in months that I felt beautiful. All too often Colin made me feel beautiful. He took every opportunity to tell me and that was at least once every single day. I sighed and smoothed the skirt of the dress a bit. It was the blue color that Colin preferred to wear and that made his eyes look even more beautiful.

I shook my head. Tonight revolved around me and my date with Jack. I didn't have feelings for him at this point, but I did notice that I was very happy in his presence. It was nice to chat with him without anyone wondering how I'm doing. I was looking forward to seeing him again. I was startled when the doorbell rang. I quickly threw some important things into a handbag, put on my heels and walked downstairs to open the front door. Jack stood in the doorway with a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hands.

'Jack... They are beautiful' I stammered as a blush appeared on my cheeks. I did not expect that he would bring anything for me.

He smiled and handed the bouquet while he kissed my cheek. After I put the flowers in a vase, we walked to his car and drove to a restaurant on the outskirts of the city.

'You look beautiful tonight, Jen' he said as he helped me get out of the car. The blush appeared on my cheeks again. 'You too'

Grinning, he slammed the car door shut and locked the car before turning to me again. 'I mean it. You are beautiful'

I didn't know what to say, but luckily he took my hand and led me to the restaurant. It was a restaurant I had never been to before, even though I often went out for dinner with friends and family. It was small but looked very expensive and luxurious. A waiter took our order and brought our drinks while we waited for the food.

Jack looked at me intently. 'So what are you looking for?'

I spilled some of my drink because I didn't expect this question at all. 'What do you mean?' I asked while I tried to dry my dress with a napkin.

'What are you looking for in a man?'

'Starting with the easy questions?' I asked sarcastically.

He shrugged his shoulders. 'I'm sorry'

I grabbed his hand and smiled at him. 'It's okay, it's just that...' I paused. 'It's just that... I'm not easy.'

He nodded. 'I know that. You've been through a lot.'

'It's not just that...'

He took my other hand and caressed it with his thumb. 'What is it then?'

'I'm looking for something that will bring meaning back into my life, Jack. I want to live, I want to be happy and I want to be able to smile again...'

He shifted his gaze from my face to the table and stared at his napkin. 'I know that feeling all too well.' he admitted.

'Really?' I asked in surprise

He nodded. 'I've also lost the love of my life.' (A/N: Chapter 14/15)

In my selfishness, I had completely forgotten that he had lost his wife and child a few years ago. 'Have you found meaning in your life again?'

He sat back a little and I could see on his face that he was a bit tensed. 'It is difficult. One day you're happy, the other day you're sad. It will stay that way for a long time. I now notice...' He paused when the waiter served us our food. We both smiled at him and thanked him before Jack continued again. 'I now notice that there is a certain void in my life that only a woman could fill.'

I picked up my fork while trying to catch his gaze. 'Is that why you started dating again?'

He took a sip of his wine and smiled. 'I haven't dated for over three years, basically, I haven't since her death'

I looked at him incomprehensively. 'So this is your first date since... since you lost your wife?'

He leaned more forward again and whispered. 'You still don't get it, do you?'

'What don't I get?' I whispered

'I have no interest in dating other women. I started dating because I want to get to know you better. I am interested in you.'

'What? Why me?'

'After I lost my wife I thought I could never love anyone again. But, when I'm with you everything is perfect and it feels so right. I really like you, Jennifer, and I'm not gonna tell you that I love you, but I think that I could someday in the future.'

I shook my head in disbelief. My brain could not comprehend what he had just said. I pushed back my chair with a lot of noise and hurried myself to the exit of the restaurant.