Heloo!!! So yasterday i just watch the WWAT FILM!!! AHHH!!! IT'S PERFECT!!! :D
"Why? I thought i meant something for you! I thought everything is real!" Thousands of tears are falling down on my face. My eyes are locked into the man who i gave him my trust, my life, my love, everything.
"Well, you dont meant anything to me, and i guess you are wrong. You see that girl?" He pointed to a girl who is sitting on his couch. I held my tear but i cant, It's to strong. "She is the one. Not you, Amanda. You dont meant a shit to me, not now, not yasterday, not ever" I gasped when i heard him. I'm frozen, my lips are closed, i cant say anything. I'm very shock of his words. "N-nothing? All of those 'i love you' 'i miss you' and everything are just lies?" I stared at him. He make a smile, and nodded. Like nothing has happend between us, that everything is just a joke to him. I dont know what i did to make him be like this.. "Amanda?" He calls. I shook my head but dont listen to him. "Amanda?" Everything went blurs.
"AMANDA!" i woke up from my dream, my memories of him. My whole body is sweating, my eyes are red, my body is shaking.
"Amanda? Are you alright? You cried? You shout's somethings!" Lilian's says, in a full time worried tone. She sat next to me. And i just burst in tears. This is what i'm afraid of, i'm becaming weak, scared, and it all because of him.
"Oh my.. Amanda" Lilian hugs me, and patts my head. I sobbed on her Pink shirt. How? Why? Why does he has to do this to me? Does he even felt the same thing right now? Or he dont even felt sorry?
"Amanda? What happend? Are you okay?" Lilian asks, still hugging me. Could i tell her? Could i give her my trust? Would she breaks it? Would she leaves me alone? Like he did?
And then i remembered what Calvin says to me once
No matter how you dont want have any friends, you still need one. Deep down you know that. Because friends is tje person who will be there for you, the only one who will listen to your problems, okay Amanda?
Maybe i should listen to Calvin once. I do feel deep down my slef that i could trust her. "Amanda?" Lilian ask. She sighs and stood up walking towards her bed. I dont think i just... "It's him" i said. It slipped. Lilians head turns around, and she furrowed her brows. "He-uh.." I look down to my feet, Lilian sats in front of me again, holding my hand. I look up at her. "It's okay, you can tell me" She gave me a warm smile. I took a big breath and...
"I had a Boyfriend when i was 15, i fell in love with him, very deep. We've been Bf and Gf for a year, and then.. one day, it was our anniv, i went to his house and.." a tear slipped from my right eye, Lilian took a sit right beside me, and rubbed my back. "It's okay" she whispers. I take a breath and continues. "I knock, but no responses, i knock once more, and i heard a girl shouts from the other side of the door. I was thingking that maybe it was his sister. And then the door flew opens, and it was a girl only wearing really dangerous shorts, and his T-Shirt. How do i know? Cause that's the shirt that i gave him on his Birthday" i take a break to caych my breath and continues. "I-i ask who she is, and he pops beside her, his hands are on her hips. I gasped, and we fought. Well, i guess it was just me. You know what is the worst? He says that i dont meant a shit for him" i looked at Lilian, her eyes are full with shock, sorry, dissabelive. "Y-yeah, and then.. I had always cries, having nightmares or Memories about him, and then.. a week later my parents split up. And in 2 weeks later, my mom made an announcement that she and George are getting married. S-so, i had sworn that i will never have any relationship, no boyfirend nor friends. Because.. i dont want to feel betray, hurt, or left alone again" i said full story. "Ssht.. dont cry" Lilian held me in her arms. I did not realise that i'm crying. My face is really wet