✔ SLAPSHOT ✖ irwin au

two

k a r r i s

✖

I was thoroughly displeased with the current situation that I would've chosen my locker to be placed in between two urinals than have to awkwardly kneel down right below Ashton's crotch in order to organize all my books and binders. I turned my head slowly, catching glimpse of Berkley several lockers down with a face full of misery. She mouthed me an "I'm sorry" before returning her attention back to the locker before her. 

I always knew Ashton Irwin wasn't the most amazing guy, but I didn't think he'd be that much of a jerk. Gabe used to always speak so highly of him-- calling Ashton a brother, and a person who would never let him down. I almost laughed at the thought. My twin obviously had one too many hockey pucks to the head, because the way Ashton had forced me to trade lockers with him only told me that number 15 was the douchiest douche in all of doucheville. 

"Don't look so upset sweetheart," Ashton's pseudo-kindness could make cancer cells multiply, "having a locker right beneath me won't be such a bad thing. I get to have the same one I've had for the past three years, and you don't have to worry about not being able to see your combination lock. It's a win-win situation. Besides, while you're down there you can always give me a quick blow job." 

I didn't even know how to respond to that. My face scrunched up in absolute, pure disgust. I slammed my locker shut, the clamorous bang echoing in the hall. Hastily, I picked up the binder and book I needed for the first half of my classes and stood up, wanting to get away from Ashton as fast as possible. However, my attempts to quickly depart became a humiliating travesty. 

BANG!

The top of my head crashed into the top of Ashton's locker door, and my hands flew straight to the shooting pain, as my glasses dangled crookedly from one ear. Ashton, along with the others around us, bursted in hysterical laughter. 

"If I knew you were so eager to get your lips around my dick, I would've worn pants that were easier to slide down," Ashton taunted in between laughter. He clutched his stomach as if to ebb the stinging pain he felt in his sides from laughing too hard. If I weren't so tan, you'd be able to see my cheeks flush from embarrassment. 

With one hand rubbing the top of my head, and the other grasping onto my school things, I hastily made my way to Berkley who had a concerned look on her face. She shot Ashton a glare full of ire before escorting me down the corridor towards the nurse's office. It was the first freaking day of school, I was on campus for less than thirty minutes and I already was humiliated miserably.

This is going to be a long school year.

"Ugh, he's such an asshole," Berkley grunted, an arm draped around my shoulder as we both entered the nurse's office. "All this over a stupid locker. He's had the same one for the past--"

"--three years," I finished with a groan, slumping down on the cushioned bed, the sanitary paper crumpling beneath my bum. "I wish we could trade lockers, but if it weren't for that teacher... The Feng Shui of lockers don't correlate with chakras and hockey wins! That literally makes no sense." 

"It's a load of bullshit, I know," Berkley agreed, "but hockey is a big deal at this school. Winning hockey games is how this school gets money. As long as the Thunderbirds keep their game up, sponsors are more likely to donate-- hence all the nice computers and teaching materials. Most teachers will do whatever it takes to make sure our school wins, even if it means giving hockey players special treatment." 

"Of all the people to have their locker above mine it had to be Ashton's," I shuddered at the reminder of having his man parts so close to my head, I could've sworn my brain was going to get pregnant, despite it not being scientifically sound.