Wretched Choices

Chapter 18

#WretchedChoicesWP

Chapter 18
Avoiding

I didn't know how long I stared at the ceiling after I woke up from a deep sleep. I didn't want to get out of the bed. I just wanted to lock myself up in my room as embarrassing memories from last night kept on flooding inside my head.

After he comforted me inside his car, he even led me to my room. If I recalled correctly, he didn't leave until I fell asleep. Well, that's what he told me. Hindi ko na alam kung anong oras siya umalis ng bahay dahil hindi ko na rin matandaan kung anong oras ako nakatulog.

Parang gusto kong sampalin ang sarili ko. Umagang-umaga ay nag-iinit ang aking pisngi. Even I was amazed with myself on how transparent I was to him last night. I knew I let myself free because he encouraged me to, and I was sure that it was what I needed that moment. I didn't regret it, however, I still couldn't believe that I really did it. Hindi ko tuloy alam ngayon kung paano ko siya haharapin kapag nagkita kami ulit.

"You did what?"

Halos mabuga ni Sharry ang iniinom niyang juice nang sabihin ko sa kanya ang nangyari kagabi. Bakas sa kanyang ekspresyon ang matinding gulat.

Humalukipkip ako. "I already said it. Hindi ko na uulitin."

I knew she understood it the first time. She just really wanted me to reiterate it and make me feel more embarrassed.

"Is that why you're not answering my text messages because you found someone else to confide in? And to my surprise, it's even Archer?"

I rolled my eyes. "Don't overreact, Sha. I just got carried away by the atmosphere and my emotions..." I tried to reason out. "That's all."

"Uhuh..." She nodded nonchalantly. "After countless times of swearing to yourself that you wouldn't be vulnerable in front of others, especially Archer, you failed yourself just because you got carried away. Never thought your conviction would be that easy to sway."

I threw her death glares. I knew exactly what she was doing. She was trying to fish more details about my failure.

To my best friend, I was like an open book. She knew me well than anyone else. It's hard to hide things from her. Kahit wala pa akong sabihin ay alam na niya agad. Sa kanya lang naman hindi gumagana ang acting skills ko.

For sure she had a clue now. She was just waiting for me to spill the beans on my own. Too bad I had no plans to tell her about it yet. She'd surely tease me 'til her heart's content.

Muli akong umirap at humalukipkip. "Ayon lang naman talaga."

"Hmm... I wonder why you sounded so defensive?"

"It's because you're trying to put words into my mouth," I told her. "Alam mo namang pagdating kay lola ay hindi ko napipigilan ang emosyon ko. That's the only reason!"

"Okay, okay..." She chuckled, and I had no idea what she was chuckling for. "So, what's your plan now?

I exhaled violently. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" She sounded slightly shocked. "Ngayon ka lang nawalan ng plano, ah. Are you really my best friend?"

Wala talagang pumapasok sa isipan ko ngayon kundi ang nangyari kagabi. Basta ang alam ko lang ay hindi ko muna kayang harapin si Archer. Saka ko na lang ulit iisipin ang mga susunod na hakbang ko kapag ayos na ako.

"Hindi pa po ba nakakauwi si Mommy?" tanong ko sa aming katulong nang makauwi na ako galing sa restaurant kung saan kami kumain ni Sharry.

Mommy told me yesterday that she'd be home by lunch, but she still wasn't here when I left earlier to have lunch with Sharry. Tinext ko rin siya, pero ang sinabi niya lang ay uuwi rin siya.