Hamartia [Peter Parker]

Chapter 8 - Push And Pull

A/n: Bolded italics are thoughts!!

It's like a wall has just toppled over Shiloh, pushing the air from her lungs in one large thud. She never wanted him to know because it's Peter. He goes out of his way to protect everyone, or at least he did, she didn't want him in the middle of this. It happened before they ever met. They were only kids and it just didn't seem right. This is her secret. Her thing that she keeps all bottled up, protecting Peter. And now it's just out in the open and it's like she's the one who can't breathe anymore. She's the one being stripped of her protective coating.

"I-I figured it out." Peter mutters but Shiloh knows he's lying.

Peter can feel his heart beating in his stomach as Shiloh asks who told him. He knew, because of Harley. There was no other point to Harley bringing up Shiloh being kidnapped and Pepper being tortured, only to say Shiloh doesn't tell him everything. It explains how the cut on her head was healed when he went to visit her at her window after they had fought. It explains how KAREN picked up on something being wrong but not being able to pinpoint it. But, that doesn't stop the ache and soul-crushing pain from radiating through Peter's bones with the confirmation.

Shiloh never wanted to be mutated. She didn't want powers or anything special. Being able to create forms of tech and just do her thing in the lab, that's the only type of "superhero" thing she wanted. Being mutated, especially with extremis, could give her powers and with that comes the responsibility of her being a hero. It's something she's always hated the idea of. Not once has she ever seen herself as a hero. Peter, doesn't quite get it since she's always been a hero to him, even before she started saving him from everything the past two years, but Shiloh doesn't see it. She doesn't want it and the extremis could have forced it onto her. If it were killing her.

"I know someone told you." Shiloh presses but her words are a little broken, silently begging him to tell her. "Harley, Rhodey, or Happy? Who?"

"I, promise..." Peter trails off a little. "I figured it out. KAREN said something was wrong....I....I guessed." Peter half-lies and Shiloh just wants the world to stop for a moment.

She leans her head against Peter's shoulder, closing her eyes and making sure she keeps her word to him, do not look at his leg. All she needs is this moment. Just one second to breathe and hope this isn't something that will push Peter back.

What if this is gonna get him to start using? Surely, he had to of just figured it out or been told otherwise he would have brought it up. So, what if this makes him shoot up again? What if it pushes him away and everything that happened tonight was for nothing? Shiloh is so close to finally pulling Peter in and getting him help, he's sitting right here in the med bay with a bandaid covering where the needle was in his arm. He's so close and what if this scares him off? What then?

Peter can sense her fear with the soft but ragged breaths and she's close so to him. Her head is buried into his shoulder, her hands squeezing his thighs to keep her balanced and his hands are still holding onto her arms. And while Peter needed that hug from her earlier and he doesn't hate this, he doesn't hate it at all actually, it's scaring him more.