One Less Lonely Heart.

You should Be Here

    Growing up, I really didn't know too much about my father. I've seen him in pictures but that was really all I had to the imagination. Nobody really talked about him. My mom wasn't really around to do so, and my Grandma didn't have much to say on the subject either. I kinda made my own assumption of him. I thought he lived somewhere far away, like California. He was rich, he was successful. He was everything I wanted my estranged father to be. As I grew older, these assumptions only got more intense. Over the years, in my mind he was Superman, a famous designer, a elite lawyer and the best chef all put in one. I could only dream.
       His name was Deshawn. I found out eventually we shared the same first name, but my mom didn't want me to be a junior. His middle name is Lee, my middle name is Kevonté. But everybody calls me Kay, I always liked it better. In the pictures he stood about 5'10. I see where I get my height from.
He was as yellow as they came, with certain facial features that stood out more than the rest. It was crazy, someone I had yet to meet looked so much like me. We literally had the same everything. Eyes, lips, definitely the nose, ears, eyebrows, the whole nine yards. I was this man's twin, and for this long while I was clueless about his mere existence.
       I often wondered though, did he ever think about me? I'm pretty sure he knows he has a little 8 year old boy that looks exactly like him. Where is he? Why isn't he here? He should be here. For a while all of my questions went unanswered, to a point I gave up asking them. There had to be a good reason he wasn't here, right?