Assassin Omega

When In Doubt, Write A Filler Talk With The Narrator

Adam hummed to himself as he drew over Matt's face. Matt was really not having a good day... First I reject him minorly, then Adam insults him, then I hit him with a basketball, and after that Adam biffed him up some more in their fight, and of course after that I rejected him majorly and now who KNOWS what was being drawn on his face.

"Uh." I said awkwardly, as people tend to be awkward when they have made another person faint through rejection. "What happens now?"

Deako shrugged. "I have a plot, but I need to get to the interesting bit."

"You still owe me an invisible dollar, you know." I reminded. "Also, your answer tells me nothing."

"So what I mean is that I need to write some boring stuff to get to the exciting stuff." Deako explained. If you don't remember, Deako is the slightly annoying, slightly weird narrator, who owes me an invisible dollar from two chapters ago.

"So this is essentially filler writing." I said.

Deako shifted uncomfortably. "Well... yes. But hopefully it's quality filler."

"Hey, Deako!" Adam called. "Want to draw on Matt's face?"

"Nah, you're doing fine there... He might need a bigger moustache." Deako called back.

"Also... is there a reason why this is a mashup of multiple tropes? Because this story certainly started out as a Teen Fiction thingymajig, but now it's a low-quality tale about werewolves."

Deako shrugged again. "Uh... 'Cuz I felt like it? Because I wanted to smack as many tropes as possible? Because I wanted you to meet Forest and Jaxxon?"

I nodded. "Okay... wait, WHAT? You mean that was all planned?!"

"It's all planned, Okami. The world, your fate and the fate of everyone around you." Deako muttered. "But it should turn out okay!"

"Right." I said, kinda hoping Deako would just give me a useful answer for once. "One more thing - what colour is Forest's hair?"

"Blonde, with a green streak." Deako answered, and stepped backwards, and as  she did she faded away to nothing.

I grinned. Of course it was. Typical.

Suddenly a great shouting arose from another corridor.

"Alpha! We caught a rogue!"

"It's pronounced 'rouge', you idiot!"

"No it ain't!"

"Well..." the first voice finished. "We caught one anyway!"

Yeah, my clan is kinda dumb. Don't judge us. I personally blame our so-called wolf halves... Or simple macho stupidity. It's effectively the same thing. And no, we are not all horny idiots or complete and utter sluts. We are people too, you know! Technically!

I heard a few clunks and then two werewolves, both in human form, came down the stairs holding a prisoner between them, followed by the third, who was holding a bow and a quiver of arrows gingerly, as if worried that they might shoot him suddenly.

When they reached the bottom of the stairs I saw the prisoner's face, and I realised who it was. 

Panic rose in me like a tsunami. Oh, no. Oh absolutely freaking no.

Damn you, Deako.