Chance
The ceiling fan create chill bumps on my bear arms as I lay on the futon in my dressing room and stare at the ceiling. The blunt drops it's ashes on to the floor, I'll wipe it up later. My brain settles and relaxes just like I need it to. The saliva definitely has help from the half of a Xan I popped an hour or two ago. It might not be such a good idea to have all this relaxing shit before a show but I'll push through. I need this relaxation before another rough show.
For the first week after Kyrie told the world Lani cheated on him the comments and posts weren't so bad. I think every fan took Keh's word for it and let it be put to rest. Then Chris fucking Brown posted some bogus shit backing Kyrie up and the world went crazy. The comments and posts and hate mail started flowing in and going anywhere public was almost impossible. I tried to post some stuff to back her up but I guess nobody gonna believe the dude she allegedly cheated with.
Every show there were a good handful of dickheads just coming to torment Kehlani. A few times people threw stuff, but mainly people yelled at her and called her names. There were even a few signs made. We've all been trying to take Keh's mind off of it and tried to reassure her while also giving her space.
It's also made our relationship so weird, like she doesn't really wanna be seen with me. And I get it but at first it felt like the situation made us closer. Like we used each other to take our minds off of it and just have fun. But the worse it got the more distance was put between us. I hate how many steps back we took.
A knock on my door makes me internally groan.
"I'll be out in a minute." I yell.
"Chance it's Sam. I gotta talk to you a sec. Its important Chancelor."
I hop up and open the door, she stands there with her worry lines showing and rushes into my room. She leans against the vanity and holds onto it. I sit back on the couch and wait for her to speak.
"You said it was important."
She takes out a pill bottle from her jacket pocket and tosses it to me.
"What's this?"
"Adderall and Ritalin."
"It ain mine, but I suggest not just tossing this shit at people. Some pill poppers get offended and aggressive when accused."
"Chance I fucking know they not yours, they're fucking Kehlani's."
My eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Why is she popping pills again, and why is Sam bringing these to me? "Do you think I gave them to her?"
"I don't fucking know. You're the only pill popping motherfucker I know on this goddamn tour."
"Why would I give Kehlani pills? Even if she asked I wouldn't."
"Really? You're like jelly in her hands, you can't tell her no."
"That still doesn't mean it's me Samantha, and fuck you for even thinking it would be. I would never put Lani in danger like that. You know how I feel about her."
She puts her face in her hands and sighs deeply. I sit back on the futon and put my head on my knees and try to calm down.
"Chance. I'm sorry." She shrubs and tears start to fill her eyes. "I'm just scared for her. I just found these and there could be more, or other shit. I mean who knows how long this has been going on?"
"I doubt anyone except Lani knows what's been going on and for how long. I can see how much this means to you and I want you to know it means just as much to me. I may do all this shit myself, but the last thing I would want is for Lani to be as fucked up as me."
"I don't even know what to say to her."
"Let me talk to her."
She raises her eyebrows at my offEr. "Are you sure? So you think it would help?"
I shrug. "If not then you can talk to her, then Ed, or all three of us. We just need to help her."
"Alright." She looks at her watch and jumps up. "The show is about to start, let's go."
I jump up with her and straighten my hat on my head before walking out behind her. Just as I walk out I see Lani walking by. She stops and looks between me and Sam and comes over to me.
"Hey."
"Hey Keh, you ready?"I ask.
Her slightly pink eyes dart around and she nods. "I guess. What was Sam doing in your dressing room?"
"Oh uh she was checking on me. I had a bad stomach ache but I'm ight now."
"Oh really? What'd you eat?" She crosses her arms but maintains a concerned look.
"Man I don't know, it might've just been nerves."
She furrows her eyebrows. "Nerves? Nigga we only got 4 more shows after this, how you got nerves."
"These last couple of shows been rough. I'm just a little worried." I rub the back of my neck and think of a way out of this conversation. "Come on lets go."
We walk to the backstage area and do the family prayer before I go on stage. I pray this goes well.
