Bat Brothers: Schooldays

Getting Ready for School- A Challenge.

Tim Drake, Jason Todd, and Dick Grayson all endured orphancy but were adopted by the great billionaire Bruce Wayne, later becoming Batman's sidekick as Robin and branching out into their own crimefighting personas. Damian Wayne was Bruce Wayne, Batman's, biological son. He was the youngest and current Robin of the Bat-family vigilante scene. He was ten years old and also: an asshole.

The boys were preparing for breakfast on Friday morning. Tim and Jason attended Gotham Academy. Dick worked downtown in the Community Center and Damian... well, Damian was homeschooled but was rather unteachable, seeing as he was a know-it-all. Now they all sat at the kitchen table, readying to face the day. Bruce descended the stairs and rounded the corner to the kitchen.

"Father, come quick to the idiot show!" He announced aloud, carrying a mug of coffee.

"JASON-FUCKING-TODD give me my homework!" Tim shouted, chasing his older brother around the kitchen table. Jason had snatched Tim's homework.

"It's not my fault your answers are so steal-able." He stopped to take a quick photo of the answers. "Here." He said, pinning the paper on his brother's forehead. "Your answers."

"DELETE THOSE ANSWERS!" Tim shouted.

Bruce, their father walked into the kitchen. "Timothy, why are you strangling your older brother?" He asked. "Stop it."

Jason shoved Tim off of himself and slipped his phone in his pocket. Tim straightened up. "We were having a... disagreement."

"Yeah- Tim was being unreasonable but he got over it." Jason teased. No one in the house was a tattletale-

"Todd took photo of Drake's answers." Damian answered. Yes, no one was a tattletale EXCEPT Damian.

Bruce sat down and grabbed the news paper. "Jason, delete them."

"Fine." Jason frowned. "They're already on the Cloud now."

"Great- so now EVERYONE knows my homework answers." Tim griped. "Good luck trying to copy from my test today." He said, eating a banana, angrily.

Jason lowered his voice. "Cute you the you're the one I'd copy off of..."

Bruce looked up. "Boys. Sit down." He ordered. They did so begrudgingly. Alfred Pennyworth, the family butler moved to pour hot water into the teapot.

"Good morning, Pennyworth." Damian greeted. "No tea for me, I'm sticking to coffee now. I find it makes me more productive."

Alfred raised his eyebrows in question, but Dick was quick to switch the mugs because "Coffee stunts your growth-" as Dick reminded.

"Yeah and if anyone needs to grow, it's Damian Wayne." Tim muttered before taking a sip of orange juice.

"Hey! Say that to my face, Orphan!" Damian shouted.

"You're a short troll, Literal Bastard!" Tim argued.

"Well I'm a bastard and an orphan so fuck the both of you-" Jason started.

"Damian! You kicked ME under the table." Dick scolded.

"And at least my mother didn't try to KILL ME." Tim reminded.

"Deep breath, Damian." Dick started
"SILENCE!" Bruce shouted. "Now, as you know it's Friday and as usual, crime peaks around 2am. We need to keep forces here in Gotham but then there is the weapons deal at the dock. It's more dangerous but-"

"DIBS!" Damian shouted, shooting his hand in the air. "I'm the most trained of the entire League of Assassins, I can take care of the dock deal myself!"

Tim scoffed. "Dude, I knocked you OUT last time we sparred." To this, Bruce trained a "Shut-up" look to the two youngest.

Damian squinted at Tim. "Funny, since I don't remember ever having lost to you."

"Probably because you were unconscious..." Tim took a sip of his orange juice and spat it back out, "YOU LITTLE BRAT!" Tim pointed.

Damian sneered and feigned ignorance. "What?"

Tim pointed a finger "You put salt in my orange juice."

Bruce set down the paper. "Damian. Did you put salt in Tim's orange juice?"

The boys were taught to never lie. "I thought that he needed some more electrolytes." Okay- half lies were a thing in the Wayne household.

Tim frowned. "Well I don't. Piss off, Damian. That's a cheap trick for a CHILD"

"Language." Bruce reminded.

Damian took of a sip of coffee. He spat it out. "WHO PUT SALT IN MY COFFEE?!"

Tim sneered. "A trick for a child, but very effective."

Damian crossed his arms in defiance. The table turned back to Jason. He looked annoyed. "Can you two just shut up for a literal second?"

"Agreed." Their father said from behind the newspaper. He once again broke away from his reading. "Tim, Jason- go get ready for school.' He ordered.

The boys got up to go pick up their bags and get to the car. Alfred was already waiting in the car when the two boys came out from the front door and down the marble stairs of the Wayne Manor.

"Shotgun!" Jason shouted.

"First come, first serve." Tim said, punching his brother in the stomach and running past him. Tim was right, however, he got to sit in the front seat while Jason sulked in the backseat, scrolling on his phone.

Alfred cleared his throat. "I do believe that you both have a test today in your math class?" Alfred asked.

Tim nodded. "Yes and I've been studying." Tim said, turning around. "Not that I am the one that needs to." He directed his comment at Jason.

Jason scoffed. "I have a pass/fail accommodation. I just need to scrape by."

"And how are you going to get by in college."

Jason straightened up. "Who said I'm going to college?"

Tim looked exasperated. "Do you think you're going to live off of Dad's fortune forever?"

Jason shrugged. "I can make money other ways."

Tim turned around. "McDonalds cashier by day, Red Hood by night." he muttered. Jason unbuckled his seat belt and scooted over to kick the back of Tim's seat HARD.

"Perhaps fight later?" Alfred suggested. "It is most unreasonable when I am driving."

"Fine." Jason sulked. He moved back to his seat and put on his seat belt. "But don't treat me like I'm a fucking idiot."

Tim shrugged. "I don't need to. You cheat with everything."

"Hey- what's that supposed to mean?" Jason asked, on edge.

Tim turned back around. "Vigilante business- your hand-to-hand combat sucks. You use guns. That's like cheap trick numbero uno, Red Hood."

"I WILL roll up the partition." Alfred threatened.

"I'm the one cheating? You can't beat Damian in hand-to-hand!" Jason scoffed.

"Neither can you!"

"Back to the gun thing- I have better aim that anyone possibly could learn. I would bank money 100% that you would kill someone with a gun."

"I don't need a gun. Guns kill people. We DON'T kill- or have you forgotten our father IS Batman."Jason unbuckled his seat belt-

"Master Jason-" Alfred started.

The boys fought in the car every morning. It honestly was a sport now.

"Yeah, yeah- seat belt." Jason muttered. He pointed at Tim. "You think you're better trained- you use a fucking staff to fight."

"And?" Tim asked.

Shit. Jason didn't have any good accusation. "No one uses a bo-staff to fight but you."

Tim smirked. "No one's good enough. Besides, I'll bet you run out of bullets before I run out of staff."

Finally the cab pulled up to Gotham Academy's front gate. "Please don't kill each other and have a productive day." Alfred said before rolling the window back up.Jason made sure to punch his little brother.---