The Secrets of Cedar Creek

30 : Everything Is Dark

I don't sleep all night. At two in the morning, I go downstairs and mix some heavier sleeping pills into some tea and drink it earnestly. I usually wouldn't take any – but I can't possibly stay awake with my thoughts any longer.

Knowing Paige was pregnant just f*cks up so many things. F*ck. Her baby died with her. F*ck, did Sylv even know? The image of her and Sylv being intimate makes me cringe – even though they were dating and I shouldn't be surprised.

I fall asleep into a dark pit. I don't dream.

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I wake up at midday and refuse to go to school, so I call Adrian – this time – and warn him that I'm coming early. It takes what seems like an hour to reach the manor. Being alone with my thoughts just seems to be a never-ending torment.

Adrian greets me at the front door with an excess amount of energy, compared to usually. "Let's go check out daddy Wittle's alibi."

"You seem eager."

"I haven't stopped thinking about what you said the other day. You were absolutely right, we shouldn't just assume the police were right."

"So you... remember all of it?"

"Word for word. Let's get going."

Knowing he remembers the entire conversation is shocking. We hop into the mustang and start driving. "Where exactly are we going?" I say, realising I haven't bothered to ask.

Adrian grips the wheel with determination. "Vulture City. Only about an hour drive."

"Wonderful," I groan, realising that an hourlong car drive definitely is not a distraction. I wince, thinking over everything.

"You look... pale."

"It's winter, you know?"

"Yes, I'm quite familiar with the weather. I meant to say that you look remarkably paler than usual."

"Thanks," I groan, watching the road.

"Have you lost weight?"

"Are you trying to dig yourself a hole?" I'd rather not admit that all the stress of moving back to Cedar definitely has made me lose some weight. I've been needing to belt all my jeans. My bra's are too loose – not that anybody is seeing my boobs anymore anyways. But it's definitely not Adrian's place to say I'm skinnier.

"As if you can tell under all these layers anyways," I comment under my breath.

"I definitely can tell."

I suddenly feel naked. But I can't stop thinking about Sylv and I feel my stomach drop.

I try with every part of my mental energy to fall asleep and silence the thoughts in my head. It doesn't work, so I lean over and turn the music up so loudly that I physically can't think anything but the lyrics.

"Alright, so my taste in food is tragic you say – but nothing is more horrific than your taste in music," Adrian comments.

A laugh escapes me, but I don't respond.

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We make it to the hotel Mr. Wittle stayed at sooner than expected. "This is supposedly where he stayed, according to the police reports," Adrian starts, getting out of the car.

When I get out, I feel dizzy and have to steady myself on the car door for a moment before shutting it. "Why was he here again?" I say, confused.

"I told you this morning, remember?"