Insanity

Lunch Time

It was lunchtime. Myungsoo sat alone yet again in the corner of the cafeteria, tracing his tattoo's with his finger. All he longs for is a friend. Someone to tell him it'll all be okay. But asking shows weakness. He tells himself this constantly. And that's why he's been alone for as long as he can remember.. that's what he's used to.

He glances up from his tattoo and noticed Woohyun on a crowded table full of nerds just like him. Myungsoo normally wouldn't care for several reasons: because they're nerds, and because he's never hoped for a friend as much as he has since he's met Woohyun. What does this mean? Why does Woohyun make him feel like this? He longed for the answers to these questions which he feared he would never get.He finds himself in a trance by Woohyun. The way he flips his hair, the dimples he gets when he smiles, and the way his eyes glisten in the light. Shivers cover his painted body, and he quickly leaves the room in shame, capturing the attention of Woohyun. Woohyun watches him leave, with a feeling of sympathy and worry towards Myungsoo. He leaves his friends, and follows him out with a nervous stance in his step.

Myungsoo sits alone on a bench in the shadowed part of the yard where the sun never greets those who sit there; exactly how he likes it. A tear gently trickles down his face and lands on the tattoo that is most special to him; Angel Wings for his mother. He uses this teardrop and traces the water over the tattoo until it's dissolved into his skin, almost like he's with his mother..just one more time.

'Are you okay Myungsoo?'

That voice. It can't be..

'AGAIN? When will he get the message? But i'm glad he ignored me. No i'm not! What am I saying? I don't need anyone. I have myself and that's enough.' All of these thoughts were spinning in Myungsoo's mind as Woohyun shuffles over and sits opposite Myungsoo. 'I saw toy leave in a rush and I was worried about you.' Myungsoo remains silent, feeling too weak and spineless to summon any words from his empty soul.

'I know you're not the biggest fan of me...' began Woohyun. Little did he know that he couldn't be more wrong. He continued on. 'However I want to let you know that i'm here if you need to talk or let anything out..' The tension was so thick, it could be cut with a knife. Myungsoo rotates his body away from Woohyun, his fingers intertwining with each other, shaking uncontrollably. Another tear trickles down his gentle face, big enough for Woohyun to notice. 'I noticed you sit on your own quite a lot.' That was all that was needed for Myungsoo's cold haze to rise to the surface of his eyes, and pierce Woohyun. 'What could he possibly understand about my life? He doesn't even know me!' Myungsoo's saddened thoughts turned to anger and frustration, as Woohyun just wouldn't leave it alone. Myungsoo wanted to talk to him about it, but  didn't know how to trust someone..

It's something he's never done.. but he was willing to try. And maybe Woohyun was the one to trust.. the one to change him.. the one to cure his insanity..

The silence was long and endearing. Myungsoo sensed deep down there was something different about this Woohyun character. He decided to use this opportunity to find out if his senses are right.. which.. they normally never are... Eventually, a dull, dark tone disturbed the sound of the silence. ''You know nothing about me.. you have no idea what it's like...' Woohyun sensed a change in Myungsoo. He went from being a closed, dusty book to being a more personal, trusting person in such a quick turn around, both confusing but amazing Woohyun! He found an opportunity, so he decided to take it!

'I don't know what what's like Myungsoo?' The sincerity in his voice caressed Myungsoo's eardrums; he had shivers down his spine. His heart beat quickened, and the grip of his hands relaxed. He slowly turns towards Woohyun, the tear sitting at the bottom of his face, resting on his jawline. His pupils grew, and he could feel a smirk creeping on his face, which he tried to hide. This was the first time he's felt comfortable with someone since his mother... and it was a feeling he wasn't used to.. and was scared but happy with at the same time.

'What it's like to...' his voice was quivering; he was struggling to get words out. The memories of his past have scarred him for as long as he can remember, and it scares him every day. 'to...' he can't get his words out. Woohyun moves towards him, but Myungsoo backs him away. He's having a small panic attack, and needs his space. Woohyun knows this more than anyone.. from his experiences with these attacks. He edges Myungsoo on in a gentle and calming way to soothe him. 'To what.. myung?' Woohyun calling  him myung soothes him more then he expected. 'When someone shortens your name, doesn't that mean they are your.. friend?' Myungsoo wondered, as his quick, short breaths reduce to slower, deep breaths to calm him.

He turns and faces Woohyun. He stares into Woohyun's soft, brown eyes. His pupils are larger too, and the creases in his forehead help reassure him. Myungsoo feels he can now get his words out. 'What it's like to fall asleep.. hoping not to wake up the next morning...' Woohyun stares.. now he cannot put a sentence together. 'H-how do you mean..?' is the only thing he can say. The eye contact remains throughout; the sincerity on both of there faces just as prominent as the others. The moment was special. Myungsoo could feel it in his heart. He knew Woohyun was different. He enjoyed his company.