We Happy Few Smut Oneshots

Cursed smut

Roger was horny. He had his dong out he was fucking anything he saw. Of course he saw a lamp. James was out of the house doing things. He probably got his dick stuck in a beehive again. It happened daily. He was into beehives apparently. Putting his dong in them because he thought it was rogers anus. 

Roger picked up the lamp and caressed it. "Oh hello lamp. I hope you'll enjoy my dong." He said as he fucked the lampshade. He moaned loudly snd then had regret. "Oh no." He had gotten his dick stuck in a lampshade. He began to sweat nervously. "I need my lamp bac...k...um." Faraday was confused at the sight. "THIS ISN'T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!" Roger said nervously.

Faraday began to tpose in concern. "I uh....got stuck..." Roger said sheepishly. "Do you wanna fuck?" Faraday said, still tposing to assert dominance. "Uh but you'll get pregnant." Roger said. "I read an article that you can use a lampshade as a condom." Faraday said, STILL TPOSING.

Roger then began to fuck Faraday with the lamp stuck on his dick still. Of course its the weirdest shit ever. And roger goes into the butt because he wants none of the pregunte to happen. He then made a cum. But it was a sad cum. "The lampshade is broken." He frowned but the sperm made his ding dong slip out of the lamp. "I AM FREE!" Roger screeched. Faraday tposed more. "My work here is done." She took the lamp and burst through a wall like the kool aid man.

Roger looked at the lampshade. He walked outside and proceeded to yeet it. "BEGONE!" He then walked back inside. "Fuck, James is still gone." He frowned and went into their bedroom that had no doors for some reason. "Oh shit, I can fuck the pole." He gasped.

James broke the window and stepped inside. Of course the front door was wide open but that was too easy. "BOYFRIEND, I AM HOME." James screamed as he walked to their room. Roger had jizzed all over the room too. "Did you repaint?" James gasped. "Aww! I'm glad you like it!!" Roger cooed and they hugged. Both were ass naked.

Rogers dong was still cumming. It was a fountain of jizz. James accepted it though. He too knew the fountain of jizz. Sometimes roger stood on the park fountain. It was his dream job. His dick just jizzing all over. People fuckin liked it. Fuckin weird ass wellies. Only guys tho. Since girls could get the pregnant.

Faraday had decided to have a romantic date with the lamp. They were at a table side dinner at s restaurant. Everyone was frightened by it. But she had a gun. She had also taped a dildo to the lamp. It was happy to see her.

Roger and James wete smooching like crazy. They used tongue in their smoochy session. Of course its a weird ass sight though. This is cursed smut after all. They were just being weird. "Oh puppy!" James cooed as roger proceeded to lick his nipples. "You got nice tits, moo~." Roger cooed back. "Oh thanks, I don't wear a bra so it's ALL FUCKIN NATURAL SHIT." James said casuslly.

Faraday was fucking the lamp. On the table. In the resturant. Thank fuck kids werent in wellington wells. Or they would need some eye bleach. Actually. The adults might need some right about now. Fuckin weird ass Faraday. Fuckin lamps at the table. She should know that's only to be done on the ceiling and not tables in restaurants. Like come on Faraday.

James and Roger were snuggling together on the front lawn. A bobby was staring in concern. But he couldn't go onto the front lawn. For there was a fence. His one weakness!! He just stared at the naked gay sailor bois. He was very scared of the sight. For he was not trained to handle naked men on the front lawn. That was not taught in bobby school. He could handle one man, but 2 was over the limit. But the fence was there. So he could do nothing but hope they'd fucking move.

EccentricMethod SUDDENLY APPEARED AND WAS VERY FUCKING CONCERNED. "Jack stop." She said to me as I continue to type. SHE WAS VERY FUCKING CONCERNED AND CONFUSED AT MY DUMPSTER FIRE CRINGE WRITING. So then she got Stevens and now I'm in baby jail. COME BAIL ME OUT PLZ. Actully jk, i climbed out. Don't tell stevens. He doesnt know about that. Shhh.

Arthur noticed faraday and stared. He had a tiny nose rather then his bulbous honker on his face. He looked like voldamort from the Harry potter series. Fuckin, no nose boi. How do he keep his glasses on now? Oh wait they were just taped onto his face. He was more blind now. He didnt need them from how much the sight scarred him for life. So now he is fully blind. He junped out the window. Even though its a one story building. So now hes in a bush outside. It was a bush bush. The bushiest bush. Fuck I don't even know at this point. Its 3:25am. I'm tired but i must finish this up. For stevenssssssss. Haaaaaa! Hes gonna love it. He still doesnt know i escaped baby jail. Least i hope he hasnt caught on.

Ok I'm tired so I'm gonna end it. Then everyone fucked. Faraday, roger, james, Arthur snd the lamp. They all fucked. The end.

927 words