Stargazer

Darkness

Y'all asked for the release, and here it is bitchessss 😉

Welcome to another shit show

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The sky above me was dark. Pitch black. There was nothing in the distance that made it look like more than just a black dot of paint on a canvas. There were no shades of blue, or little sparks of light painted in yellow. It was just black.

I hated the color black. Black is just the absence of color. A person sees black when no light can reach the eyes. Black absorbs all of the light, not leaving anything for the rest of the colors. Black is selfish.

I sighed as I stood up from my spot, disappointed at what the night has brought. All I had looked forward to today while I was at work was watching the beautiful night sky, the blues mixed in with the blacks, and the twinkling of the golden stars.

The sky was as disappointing as my day today.

With my hands stuffed in my pockets, I began the long walk home. The cool air made me shiver on occasion, making me wish I had remembered a scarf, but I shrugged the chill off, burying my neck and cheeks as deep into my sweater as I could.

I continued to ponder over my day as I continued my stroll, the things surrounding me becoming a blur. I could still remember the disappointed look on my editor's face when he handed me back my manuscript. That look would be engraved in my skull until the day I die, I bet. Disappointment is the face that brings me the most guilt.

Why, you may ask, was disappointment make me feel guilty?

Because I know that somehow, someway, I am the sole proprietor of their disappointment.

Take the incident with my editor, for example. Sure, he is kind of an ass and has extremely high expectations, but, I know that I should've been more careful when I was working on my project. I had disappointed him solely by not putting in the amount of effort expected of me.

I sighed, coming out of my depressing state due to the sound of a siren in the distance.

That's the thing about living right outside the city: the city noise can still be heard, but there is still a silence in the air that it comforting.

I saw the flickering streetlight in my view, meaning I was just about to my apartment complex. I pulled out my keys, jiggling them in an attempt to find the key that I needed to open the door.

I unlocked my door, closing it shut and locking it instantly. I groaned as I looked at the messy state of my studio apartment. My bed sheets were kicked off the bed. My dinner from last night sat virtually untouched on the tiny coffee table in front of my small television. My clothes from yesterday were strewn on the arm of my chair.

I ran a hand through my hair as I slipped off my shoes, wasting no time in crawling into my bed, turning the light off, not even bothering to pull the covers over my chilly body.

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Lol I'm super excited about this one.