The Good Girl Plays the PLAYER

Chapter 35

I sat on his bed crossing my arms and legs and waited, waited for the explanation that I knew would probably never come. Was he going to voluntarily give one? Obviously not, but I wasn't going to back down either. I sat here patiently waiting in silence not moving an inch and he did the same, just standing there, very still and glaring at me. It was a battle of wills and I was winning, as I could tell by his hand fisting by his side, hitting his own leg repeatedly, his nerves and temper on the verge of bursting out.

On any other occasion, I would have probably lost my own temper and started a fight with him, but when looking at him now, with new loving eyes, he just seems like an adorable child about to throw a hissy fit and I'm struggling to keep a straight face, due to the fact that I'm finding this all too amusing and cute. I press my lips tightly together, hard so as to not let a sound or a giggle escape. If it did, I knew it would only fuel his anger more and make things worse.

"Just because I played around with you, doesn't mean you and I have some deep connection. I lied about everything, I lied about loving you just so I could get you in my bed, but now I'm kind of bored with it all and I want you to leave!" He says with a smug look. He just had to open his mouth and say something horrible like that, it just wouldn't be Liam otherwise. Okay, so this is how he wants to play it, he want's to push me away with his usual hateful words, which I know he will regret later on. "Is that the best you can come up with? You and I both know you don't mean that!"  I say back impassively, pretending that those words didn't affect me at all, when in actuality it did. "After hearing everything downstairs, knowing that I lied to you, you are still going to cling on to some deluded bit of hope, thinking that I actually cared about you?" He laughs sarcastically, trying his best to hurt me again, and I can't deny it's kind of working.

"You truly are naive aren't you? I gave you some sob story, to make you feel sorry for me and get you in my bed, that is all and it worked for the most part. Had we not been interrupted, I would have deflowered you, soiled you, but alas, is was not meant to be!" He laughs again, whole-heartedly and this time it really did hurt.

"Wow! You really are a jerk you know that? I know you are angry with me and you hate the fact that I know that you lied about stuff, but guess what! Instead of leaving your sorry ass, I stayed because I wanted to understand you, understand why you felt the need to lie, because I love you!" I shout, tears threatening to spill at any moment, my strength and will power fading away fast. " You know what? I'm tired of all this" I wave my hands around probably looking like a raving loon. "I'm tired of us fighting all the time when we both now we care for one another, but I can't keep doing this with you anymore!"

I pick up my jacket and without looking back, I leave the room, slamming the door behind me. I run down the stairs ignoring his father who was in the landing with a glass of brown liquor, who looked at me with surprise and confusion as I left slamming another door. It was dark and cold with hardly any cars roaming around and I had no idea where I even was. I guess I'll figure it out somehow, I just need to keep walking in one direction, get to a main street and get my bearings from there.

I had hoped he would come after me, stop me from leaving, but I guess I was deluded after all, just like he said.

•••••

I've been walking the empty streets of North London for about an hour and every little sound that emerges occasionally, freaks me out. I hate being without a phone and I feel naked and vulnerable without it, at least I'm not too far away now. I've finally reached the Hendon Way and I estimate another fifteen minutes walk before I finally get home.

As I carry on walking, I suddenly hear footsteps behind me. I keep my pace steady, not wanting to seem scared or freaked out, but the truth is I totally am. I've never been out this late and on my own and hearing someone behind me getting closer, is totally making me shit myself. There isn't a car in sight, the silence of the city at this hour of the night is haunting, and so I pick up the pace, trying to maintain a safe distance from the stranger behind me and wanting to get home to safety as soon as possible. I can sense this person's presence getting closer and I can't believe this is actually happening to me. I'm nearly home and now I have some freak following me? Could I be any unluckier? I put my hands in my pocket and fist my keys in my hand, with each key poking out between my knuckles, like a weapon as I have absolutely nothing else to use to defend myself, should I need to. As the strangers steps get louder as they get closer, which is not that hard considering I'm like a freaking midget compared to most of the general public, I try to mentally prepare myself, ready myself for any potential attack.