Love as Betrayal {#2}

Chapter 5 - Brotherly Slut Shaming

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I stared at him. He watched me.

"What do you mean you can't love me?" I asked skeptically.

My heart had dropped to my stomach moments ago when he said he couldn't love me.

"Adrena, the problem isn't that I don't love you, it's that I can't. I can't get you caught up in things, I can't be what you need." He whispered.

"I don't need you to be anything, I just need you to be you, to love me like only you could!" I told him pleadingly.

"And how's that? Huh? By getting you murdered?! News flash Adrena, this mark on my arm forever connects me with the one person who's trying to kill you. I couldn't live with myself if you died. It's better for both of us to just keep our distance." He turned back to the sink, letting out a sob. "I have to do something Adrena, something unforgivable, something that will change who I am. I can't, I can't put you in the middle of this." He said.

I walked up behind him, arms reaching around to try and hold the boy I love. To gather all the broken pieces that were currently loosing there hold inside him. I turned him around and held his face. He was still crying.

"Look at me." I told him and waited until his eyes were staring straight into mine.

"Whatever you have to do, no matter how bad. I understand you don't have a choice. I want you to know that I will have to choose the other side of whatever it is you do but I won't blame you. Your not the one to blame in all this. Your parents had no right trapping you in this. If I could I would take it all away. But for now you have to do what you have to do to stay alive. Let me fight the evil alright?" I told him searching his face.

His resolve cracked and he feverishly pressed his lips to mine. We had only ever shared a few kisses, this one being the most passionate, the most intense, the most intimate. He pulled me to him. He gripped my thighs and pulled me up so I was hanging off his waist. Our bodies where so close to one another. After a couple more seconds I pulled away. Then I just hugged him, and he hugged me back, crying into my shoulder. He leaned me against the wall and dug his face even further into my shoulder, sobs rippling from within him.

"Your going to hate me. When this is all over your not going to want anything to do with me."

Life suddenly seemed so grim. But I had a little bit of hope because I could see it in him, that he wanted to be good, that he never wanted the situation he was in. That his souls could still be saved. We stayed there, we eventually slid down a wall to the floor and I just sat in his lap as he cried. He eventually stopped and just held me close some more. We weren't official, but we were raw and real. I saw all his built up emotion. At this point in time I didn't care for a label. I just wanted ya to be together, making each other happy. Whatever label someone put on it was their business. I sighed in content and hugged him harder.

"I love you Draco."

"I love you to Adrena."

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Draco and I had parted just before curfew. I had scurried back towards the common room and got in just in time. The trio took in my swollen lips, messy hair and crooked tie. Hermione grinned at me, and I back at her. Ron looked sick and Harry looked like he was about to explode.

"If you've come to gloat about your relationship go bother someone else." Harry said through gritted teeth.

"Harry!" Hermione hissed.

"I won't bore you with the amazing details Harry, I hope one day you find a relationship as meaningful as the one I have and realize just how amazing it is. Maybe then you won't be so judgmental that I found happiness." I told him, unaffected by his glare. He was really being childish so I decided to ignore him.