the darkest hour// haylor au

Chapter 26

Chapter 26

Taylor's POV

I was shocked and confused at the same time. It's like, my heart is racing and it beats rapidly than normal.

I don't know but somewhat confused how do we end up here. How do I end up here talking to him that kind of subject. It's weird to think that we're talking about something comfortable to talk about and now we reach this kind of subject that I can tell it's awkward to talk about.

"I want you to be my girlfriend."

All the things he said awhile ago, and now, was still shocked me. That's the last thing I would expect him to say to me.

"I.... W....."

"It's okay if you don't answer it now, Taylor. I will give you time to decide. I know it sounds shocking but, I really really like you Taylor from the first day we met. And I'm telling you this because I will regret it later if I didn't say it now. Uhh... And I think I'm gonna go now, thanks for letting me stay the night by the way." and with that, he let go of my hand and he wear his T-shirt that he wear last night and stormed out of my apartment.

Now I'm left standing there, cannot still believe about what he said.

I decided to just a cold water in my fridge, trying to freshen up. My mind is still processing about the things that he said. Should I say yes to him? I know that I like him, because if I don't like him I wouldn't be thinking of him and I wouldn't feel butterflies in my stomach just seeing him smile.

But is saying yes to him is a right decision? What if it's not?

What if I will lead in the same situation like my sister have? What if I fall inlove with him? What if he wil just left me alone when he's already done with me? What if he doesn't accept my past? What if I will just shut up and stop thinking about these things. My mind is not with me today.

I checked the time at my watch. 10:02

"Shit" I cuss at myself as I realize that I was so late at my work. I forgot that I have a work to go to.

But I decided that I will not come there today since it's too late to go there anyway. I will just make an excuse to Mr. Timberlake.

Since I haven't slept that much last night, I decided to take a nap and I slowly drape my body at the soft comforter and closed my eyes.

*****

After waking up from my nap, I feel like my body is relaxed and calm, even my mind stops working. I decided to just went to a grocery store and buy some things and food I would use. Since I don't have stocked up foods now.

I tie my hair up and put it in a messy bun and wear my skinny jeans and my long coat with a white shirt under it. I wear my favorite pair of my Oxfords shoes and wear some light make up to look a bit presentable.

When I'm finished, I grab my phone, purse and the key of my apartment door, and locked the door.

***

I went to the nearest grocery store that called 'Ween And Been'. There's not much people here when I came in. I grab a two small blue basket and put it at the handler of the basket with wheels.

I went around to find some foods, shampoo, soap, anything that I needed to have.I mindlessly grab items from the shelves, puttung into my basket. By the time that I know that everything that I needed is all at my basket, I went to the cashier to pay my items.

Resting my basket at the checkout, the cashier immediately scans the items in my basket lazily. The cashier looks like pale and exhausted and have a big bag under her blue eyes, I guess because of working here 24 hours a day, who wouldn't be look like that. She's not young yet old, I guess she's in her mid 20's I think. But because of her pale face, she looks like an old woman. But her face looks familiar though, I don't know where I saw her but maybe she bought a coffee at our shop last time so maybe she looks familiar to me. I also notice that she wears a necklace that looks also familiar to me.....

“Miss are you just gonna stand there or do you want to move in?” The cashier said to me and I realize that there's customers waiting for me to finish.

“What's the total?” I asked.

“Exactly 10 pounds” she said warily. I dig my purse to get the money and when I get it, I give it to the cashier and the cashier give me my receit.

I grab the paper bag where my items are inside the bag and leave the grocery store.

I still don't feel like going home so I decided to just roam around the city. I roam around this city of London for like, hundred times and I still can't get enough of the scenery.

 While I was picking something in my paper bag, someone bumps me and the paper bag falls to the ground.

"Watch your step."  the person said and as I was going to complain to that person, the person was gone. Well that was rude. I pick my groceries and put it  in at the paper bag.

After roaming for like hours I headed to my apartment and arrange the groceries I bought. As I was going to bed, I remember about Harry's question. Wanting me to be his girlfriend. It's like it's unbelievable. It's a new feeling for me to make my heart flip out with just one sentence. I want to say yes but what if i'm not yet ready at commiting myself? What if I will just get myself hurt in the end?

Here we go again, so many what ifs. But I remembered what Avril said, life is all about taking risks and follow your heart. I can't help but to ask myself, am I ready for relationship? I mean I had a boyfriend when I was 14 but that wasn't serious. But if I follow my heart, I will say yes to him. But if I follow my mind, I would say the opposite.

I don't know why I am afraid of commiting but maybe it's just I'm afraid of losing someone.

I shook my head. Can someone please tell me how to shut my brain up? This is really tiring.

"How about get some sleep now Taylor." I said to myself. And I did what I should do. Just sleep.

****
A/N

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