Love Doesn't Exist (bxb)

~Chapter nine~

He made his way into the seat in front of me and looked me in the eyes and smiled. Every smile he gives me now just feels like another blow in my heart, in a negative way. "Stop that." I finally got myself to say when he didn't stop smiling.

His smile fell a little but not dramatically, "Stop what" Isaiah questioned like it wasn't obvious in what I was talking about.

"What you're doing," I said getting irritated but now wasn't the time to get irritated. I am definitely not in a position to do so too.

"What am I doing?" It can't just be me, but I think he is really trying his hardest to make me mad. He can somehow just do that, and it gets me...mad.

"Smiling," I said before I added something unnecessary, but I just had to clarify for him. "it doesn't make me feel any better when you do so"

I looked at him straight in the eye but, redirected my focus on all the damage he has taken from me. Small but prominent bruises on his cheeks, upper arm, and most likely on his chest area. Small scratch marks on his chin, I really did a number on him.

Then at that moment, I felt tears start to circulate. "No this can't be happening," I said as I used my sleeve to wipe them away.

"Mark?" I heard Isaiah say in a concerned tone as I also felt his big hand on my shoulder gently.

I pushed the hand off me, "No I am not crying." I honestly refused to think that this idiot would make me cry.

"Mark," He said again while putting his hand back on my shoulder.

I shook my head wildly, "No"

"Mark" I felt his hands loosen their grip on my shoulders but slowly slid down my arm and grabbed my wrist and squeezed it tightly.

"Get away from me. All I ever do is ruin people's lives." I said in total desperation, cause I knew all too well that he wouldn't listen now if he didn't listen before.

"No you don't" See, I knew it.

Tears one by one falling as Isaiah slowly pulled my arms away from my face to reveal the mess. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I cried into his chest. "I'm sorry for misunderstanding. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry I thought your feeling wasn't genuine."

Isaiah didn't respond, just gave me the same face he has been giving me since day one. This can't be right. "Why can't you be like the others and just ignore me?"

"Because I have come to like you a lot." He said in a not so settle way.

My eyes grew large, but I quickly calmed myself down and confirmed something. "In what way?"

"Romantically." He deadpanned while his cheeks grew pink.

I shook my head, "No" I said in return.

"Yes," He confirmed while his grip on my wrist tightened and he slowly pulled me closer to his chest.

"Isaiah stop kidding around with me." I wasn't ready to even have a simple friendship, why must things go so fast for me.

"But I'm not." He said and I could tell he was trying his best to be serious.

"I'm not sure Isaiah. You know what happened when you were just trying to be friends with me." I tried to talk him out of it.

"Yeah, so what." He said with no clue in what I was hinting at.

"I can't date someone, and you should defiantly not date me it would be a complete waste of time." Isaiah looked me in the eyes and moved his face closer to mine and I was going to slap the shit out of him if he kissed me but he just touched our foreheads together with a cheeky little smile on his face and his eyes closed.

I thought to myself that if he was thinking of me as nothing special and simply kissed me out of the mood then I wouldn't trust him enough if I tried to set boundaries, but with this gesture, I think it made me rethink about how I viewed him as a person. I whispered to him, "You know what you're getting into right?"

"No way you are going to accept my confession." I looked at him with a glare saying that wasn't the right answer, "Oh um... yeah, of course, I do." He said with a small chuckle.

"If I come to think that you are using me as one of your boy toys I will beat the shit out of you again," I said glaring at him with a serious look.

"Haha is that what you think of me as." He said laughing.

"Everyone in the school does," I said finally pushing away from him, too much skinship all at one time.

"Well, they are wrong, if anything I was the one being toyed with." He stilled laughed.

I wasn't laughing though, "What?" I said seriously.

"All of my past dates if you could even call it that were experiments to the others. I am the only gay in the school so, horny teenaged boys were curious, and I guess that's how it all started." Isaiah explained

After he finished, I was dumbfounded, I and everyone were thinking the wrong thing about Isaiah the whole time. Yet again, I contributed to some shitty acts. "ahhh" I groaned, "Why must I assume everything.

"I have a great idea." Isaiah blurted out while getting up from the chair and turned to face right on top of me. He grabbed my hands and looked me straight in the eyes while smiling, "How about we date so we can get to know each other more."

My face exploded into reds and pinks and my mind went blank as I aimlessly stared into his smiling eyes.

"Hello?" Isaiah said questionably while waving his hand in my face.

I refocused and my mind actually started working, "Isaiah...I"

He suddenly put a finger to my lips saying shhh with his eyes closed "You don't have to answer now, I can---"

"Shut up I was going to say my fucking answer," I said cause I somewhat was already thinking along the same page, no not really the same page, same chapter.

"What" He looked at me shocked.

"I was going to say yes idiot before you shoved your finger all up on my lips," I said looking away from him so he couldn't see the total embarrassment in my face.

"Haha that was just a joke. Why did you take it so seriously?" He said and for a second I was going to curse him out, but I turned around and saw him trying to hide his face, which was beet red now.

"Yeah sure that's why your blushing so much." I decided to tease him a little, just for the fun of it.

He then hid his face in his hands even more. And I had honestly thought that was super cute. I hope I can enjoy this time with him and make it an interesting part of my life and not a regrettable one.