Broken (Prinxiety)

2

  TW: Depressive thoughts/words, panic attack

    Virgil just stared at the side that was in his room, unable to think of something to say. The side looked just like him. The same dark eye shadow under his eyes, the same dark attire...he was his twin in every way. The only difference was the other side had pallid skin and was completely devoid of color. He was just shades of black, white, and grey. 

      "Aw what's wrong, cat got your tongue?" Depression gave him a wicked smile and drew closer.

     He wasn't supposed to be here. He wasn't supposed to be roaming the mind palace! If he was, then that meant that Virgil's power over Thomas was next to nothing. Thomas wasn't scared of him anymore. And if he wasn't scared, then Virgil wouldn't be able to protect him.

      He had failed him yet again.

      When Virgil had decided to leave the dark sides, he had locked Depression away so that he couldn't harm Thomas anymore. It had taken all of his power to do so, and it resulted in the rest of the dark sides to be less than happy. Well, besides Remus. 

      "How did you get out?" Virgil's voice was shaky, and he took a step back, pressing himself against the door. He knew that his twin would be angry. He wasn't sure just what the other male would do. 

      "Wouldn't you like to know!" Depression laughed his fake, empty laugh. "It doesn't matter. I'm back now, and there is nothing that you can do about it."

      Virgil was growing more and more panicked by the moment. What if Depression targets one of the other sides? What if he hurts Thomas? What if he was powerless to stop him? 

      His panic faded as quickly as it arrived as Depression placed a hand on his shoulder. The touch just caused him to feel...empty. Numb. 

      Depression leaned in real close, only a few inches separating their faces. "I've spent my time locked away thinking about how I was going to get you back. At first, I thought about hurting those light sides that you left us for. But they don't really care about you, and you know it."

      "That's not true," Virgil protested weakly, averting his eyes. He felt a small pang in his chest as he realized that Depression was right. The others didn't care. Not even Patton; he was only including him to be nice. 

      "Quit lying to yourself," Depression sneered. "All of them hate you. They think you're a nuisance, and that all you do is create problems where there are none. And do you know what? They wouldn't care if you disappeared. They probably wouldn't even notice." 

      Virgil let his words sink in, slowly realizing that the other side was right. They tolerated Virgil, but often disagreed with his thoughts. They would tell him that he was being paranoid. And they were open about their dislike for him. Well, Roman and Logan, that is. He had thought that Patton would've been different, but he could be wrong about him. 

      "So I think that a fitting punishment for you is to live out the rest of your miserable existence knowing that you have no friends. That you have no one to help you through the tough times. That they hate you." Depression drew back and removed his hand, and all at once emotion hit Virgil like a truck. 

      First came his panic and anxiety. Next came the sadness and hurt from his realization. Tears welled up in his eyes, and he trembled slightly. Everything was just too much. 

      His panic grew. His breathing became shallow and erratic, and tears blurred his vision. He couldn't breathe. He could hear Depression say, "Pathetic," though it sounded far away.

     "H-help..." Virgil's voice was no more than a croak. 

      He was going to die he was going to die he was going to die--

      "Kiddo! Kiddo, are you o--Virgil!" Virgil barely registered the door opening and the sound of Patton's voice. He was just too consumed in his panic. 

      "Hey, it's okay, just breathe. In for four seconds, out for four seconds." Virgil tried to do as Patton said, but he just couldn't. He couldn't breathe--

      "I promise that it'll be okay. Just breathe, okay? You'll be fine. I promise that nothing will happen to you." Patton's voice was soft and soothing. 

      Eventually, Virgil managed to calm himself down enough to be able to think rationally. He felt drained, as if all of the energy was sapped out of him. His anxiety started to act up again as he realized that Patton had seen him having the attack. 

      What if he decided that Virgil was too pathetic to deal with? What if he thought that he was too much work to bother with? What if he--

      His thoughts were interrupted as the fatherly trait pulled him into a tight hug. Virgil tensed at first, still trembling. He soon relaxed and hugged him back. He didn't understand why Patton was here, or why he was so concerned about him.

      Maybe Patton actually did care about him. 

      Patton pulled back slightly, clearly concerned. "Kiddo, I am so sorry...do you have those often?" Virgil hesitated before nodding. "And you deal with them by yourself?"

      "I guess I usually just wait them out." Virgil winced slightly at the sound of his own voice. It was small and shaky. He sounded weak. 

      Patton's eyes went wide, and he hugged Virgil once more. "Well, you don't have to go through that alone ever again, okay? I'm here for you, and so is everyone else. You don't have to be afraid to ask for help." 

      Before Virgil could say anything at all, Patton gently took his hand and tugged him out into the hallway. "Come on, I'll make you some hot chocolate! And you can have more cookie dough, too."

      Virgil managed to muster up a small, genuine smile. "Thanks...dad."