Duyên || Clint Barton

029 || stark

•••

2 weeks until the finals and I was working myself into the ground, hardly seeing anyone other than Nat around the compound.
"Come on, you're going out today. We're gonna visit Stark"
I groaned, pulling the covers over my head.
"Grace, please. For me"
"I thought he hated you"
"He doesn't hate me"
"It seemed like you hated him when you left-"
"Things are different now-"
"What makes you think he wants to see me? After what I've done?"
"No one blames you for what you've done, Grace. You didn't treat me differently when you heard about my past did you?"
"No, but-"
"You did no worse than me. Get up, we leave in an hour"
"Since when were you the one in charge" I huffed, rolling out of bed grouchily.
"Since you became a child"
"Ow. That hurt me Nat, right there" I pouted, pointing to my chest.
"Up" she demanded, shooting me a smile before leaving the room.

•••

"I don't know about this Nat -"
"Shut up and smile" she said under her breath, elbowing me in the ribs before walking out of the jet. My stomach dropped as we stepped out onto grass.
"So he owns a farmhouse..."
"Oh god - Grace I didn't think - do you need to leave?"
"No" I croaked, clearing my throat slightly, "I'm good. Fine. Let's just - let's just go in"
She nodded, hand resting on my lower back as we walked towards the front door, Tony swinging it open as soon as we stepped on to the porch.

"You're alive!" He cheered weakly, pulling me into a hug. I returned the gesture, slightly confused at his sudden embrace.
"Woah, a hug from Tony Stark? Without threats? Am I dead?"
"Har har. I'm just glad to see you alive" he replied sarcastically, stepping aside so we could enter the house.
"Pep! They're here!"
Nat slipped her hand into mine as Pepper walked around the corner, a big smile on her face. My eyes were immediately drawn to her slightly swollen stomach, hand tightening around Nat's in response.
"You're pregnant" I croaked, a forced smile on my face, "congratulations! How far along are you?"
"Thank you, we're 3 months along" Pepper beamed, and I was grateful that she was seemingly unaware of the falseness of my tone.

After half an hour I had eventually relaxed into the conversation, pushing all of my feelings down to work through later, determined to try and fix my friendship with Tony.
"So you kinda had a psychotic breakdown huh?" Tony quipped, a shocked Pepper elbowing him immediately, "ow! What? She did!"
I rolled my eyes at him, repressing the smile threatening to pull at my lips, "nice way to put it Stark"
"Wanna talk about it?"
I exchanged a quick glance with Nat, her gaze full of silent apologies that I'm sure were exactly mirrored in Pepper's expression.
"Nope"
"M'kay. Wanna see my truck? I got a truck. I'm rural now"
I snorted at his topic change, but nodded as I stood up from the seat, a small smirk on my face.
"Bet it's not as good as mine was"
"Honey, it's better than yours by miles"

With a final  reassuring glance from Nat, I followed Tony from the front room, his eyes lighting up as we approached the truck.
"What do ya think? I painted her myself"
The corner of my lips tugged up into a weak smile as my fingers idly traced the frame of the truck, the red and gold paint job staring boldly back at me.
"It's very ... you"
"That was the aim" he winked, patting the bonnet fondly, "good old machine this one - wanted a project to do - keep me busy"
I hummed in response, playing with my sleeves nervously.
"I was serious earlier Grace. If you ever need to talk -"
"I'm fine, Tony, thank you. I will be fine. I think, probably"
"Seems it"
I rolled my eyes at his sarcastic tone, crossing my arms defensively.
"Well there's not much I can really say can I? We're all in the same boat here, you just got lucky - you deserve it though - finally getting this" I smiled, gesturing to the woodlands surrounding us, "you earned it Tones, make the most of it"
"I - thank you"
The billionaire shuffled awkwardly on the spot at the praise, scratching his neck.
"Okay, am I gonna be the one?"
"I don't know what you're talking about Grace"
"Don't make me do it Tony"
We stood in silence for a while, daring the other to move.
"Pussy" I snorted, launching myself at him and bringing him into a tight hug.
"There we go. I was wondering how long you were going to stew in the awkwardness"
"Fuck you Stark ... I missed you"
"I missed you too"

•••

As we arrived back at the compound I greeted Steve and Rhodey briefly before fleeing to my room, desperate to be alone to process today. My mind ran wild with feelings, mostly happy ones for Tony finally getting the family he deserved, but the darkness loomed at the back of my mind when I saw him getting everything I once had. Muffling a small sob, I clenched my hands in my hair as I rocked back and forth on my bed, memories of my children flooding past the walls I had carefully crafted during the first few weeks after the snap.

After a few hours of tossing and turning I had had enough, rolling out of my bed and trudging along the hallway to Nat's room.
Knocking on the door softly, I poked my head into the room.
"Can I sleep with you?"
"Sure" she yawned, shuffling over and lifting the covers invitingly, "c'mon in"
I thanked her quietly, slipping into the bed, her arms wrapping around me. All the tension that seemed to be held in my muscles melted away at her touch, the tears returning almost instantly.

Natasha only pulled me closer as I cried.