Title: Love
Type: angst
Female reader
How does one fall out of love? And what is love?
Well, the first answer is a process. First, one must fall in love. Blushing and giggling, smiling brighter than the sun. They would care for this person and love them through everything. They would value their happiness over their own. Then, the person you love meets someone else. That person captivates their hearts, makes them infatuated with them. Thirdly, the other person returns that love. That leaves you with a broken heart.
Supposedly, the pain fades. Supposedly, you start to feel better. Supposedly, your heart is healed. That's what's supposed to happen.
And love? It's a noun, an emotion, a passion. Love is supposedly beautiful. Or at least, it's beautiful when your other half reciprocates those feelings.
Y/n soon learned this. She learned this easily. Y/n L/n had been friends with John Laurens since diapers. He told her everything, she told him everything. Or, she used to.
Y/n loved John with her whole heart, her whole being. She tried to make every word she spoke to him be loving as well as her actions. John was her sun, her everything. He made her happy in a way that no one else could.
"Hi, I'm Peggy. Peggy Schuyler. You're one of John's friends, right?" a bright, bubbly, sweet brown haired girl wearing a yellow dress introduced.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm Y/n, friend of John," Y/n replied, smiling at Peggy. "How do you know John?"
"We met at a fair. I won him a turtle plushie," Peggy declared proudly. Y/n's smile faded a little. So that's where he got that from, she realized.
"Not trying to be rude, or anything, but can I ask why you're at my house," Y/n said as politely as possible. Peggy beamed.
"John and I are going out," she explained. I wonder if she can hear my heart drop, Y/n thought, plastering a big, fake smile on her face.
"I'll get him."
It hurt to see him so happy with Peggy. But she was his sun, his everything. Not her. And Y/n was struggling to accept that.
She loved that Peggy made him so happy. That's all she could ever want, for John to be happy. It was hard though. Because she wasn't the one making him smile, making his eyes light up, making him laugh.
"Y/n, I have some exciting news for you," John beamed, sitting on the couch with Peggy. Y/n had just gotten home from work and was tired.
"What is it," she yawned, leaning against the wall. The couple looked at each other happily, John squeezing her hand.
"We're getting married!" Peggy squealed, gesturing to her ring. Y/n forced the biggest smile she could muster.
"That's great!" Y/n lied, beaming at them.
The wedding was... rough, to say the least. Y/n had a fake smile on all day, though her eyes were dead and lifeless. But that didn't matter to her. All that mattered was that John was happy.
Living on her own now, Y/n recalled all those moments John would confide in her. He would ramble on and on about Peggy and how much he loved her. She knew that he was happy, she could tell by his beautiful green eyes.
So many dead. So many wounded. John could only pray that Y/n would not be one of the bodies on the white beds.
The war was over. They had finally triumphed against the British. That didn't matter to John Laurens.
"Y/n?!" he had found her. He had finally found her. Lying on a mattress, cold and lifeless. People gathered around the dead or wounded, grieving. Nobody was here for her.
"Torture," a voice said behind him. John turned and saw a nurse looking sadly at Y/n." British tortured her. She escaped and was shot in the final battle."
That explained the multiple scars and bruises, as well as the bleeding from the middle of her torso. Her eyes were still open, staring into nothing. A tape caught John's eye.
John Laurens it said.
"Hey, John," Y/n said on screen. She waved. "If you're watching this, I'm probably dead, heh." She scratched the back of her neck and nervously chuckled. "Cause I'd sure as hell never tell you this if I was alive.
"I recorded this because I thought you deserved to know. You deserve so much, Jackie. In this recording, I will tell you a regret(?) and a much-needed thank you.
"Before I start, nothing is your fault. You have done nothing wrong. You are not at fault and I am not angry or anything. Heh, I could never be angry at you.
"I love you, John. So much. You are the one person I would die for. You are the one person I know I can confide in. And I love you.
"Y'know, it's hard. It's hard when the one you love, loves someone else. That's a love triangle, I guess. But I think that if you truly love someone, their happiness comes first. So, I am genuinely happy for you and Peggy. She makes you so happy in ways I never did. And I'm glad. All I want is for you to be happy.
"I didn't say anything cause I thought it would be selfish. You have provided me with so much happiness, so much joy. You deserve someone who can give you the same.
"Thank you. For the fun. For the laughs, the smiles. Thank you for the late night talks and care. You are the light of my life, and I know that's cheesy, but it's true. Thank you.
"Please be happy with Peggy, Jack," tears were running down her face as she smiled. A sad smile. "Start a family, show her how much you love her. She loves you too, with all her heart. Keep her close and don't let go.
"Don't feel guilty. Nobody can control how they feel, I know, but try. Nothing is your fault. You are not at wrong. Go, live your life with her. Overwhelm her with love and joy. And if I'm stuck in your mind, forget about me. I'll only burden you. See you on the other side, John."
The recording ended and I sat in shock for five minutes at the least. She loved me. Y/n loved me. I was so blind.
I should've taken better care of her, should've seen behind her mask. I'm an idiot. And I was too late.
