NO LONGER THERE

CLUSTER SEVEN

THE "A" WORD

"I should have never gotten engaged."

I shouted as I stormed into my hotel suite, fired up after my Good Evening Chicago interview. My poor publicist steps behind, listening to me rant.

"One question." I continued my tirade as she fielded messages and emails behind me.  "Three and a half minutes of precious air time and she asks me one question about my book? Bryce and I have been together for six years and now, now we're a hot topic of conversation?"

I threw off my shoes and spread eagle on the couch. She stood there, looking at me over her glasses, waiting for my next emotional eruption. She was a great publicist, with her hands full keeping my career focused on my newest book, "Young, Successful, Black and White in America, instead of my engagement to Bryce, my hairstyles and Clarence's dementia."

"My apology, Raina," I said as my 'normal' returned.

"Don't be. Better you blow off steam here than on set. I'll talk to the producers for Alive Atlanta before next week. They will have to sign an agreement to stick to the questions we sent, or I'll cancel your appearance."

I sat up and placed my head in my hands. "Thanks, I'm just so tired of this, all of this. I've worked my ass off to be taken seriously as a professional author, speaker and activist. In one night, it all evaporated into wedding talk, Amazon Barbie comparison's and questions about Bryce's fortune."

Raina remained calm in my storm. "Relax, enjoy tomorrow off, and I'll see you after breakfast, okay?"

Two weeks into the book tour and Amazon Nova was everywhere. Every interview, tweet, social media post and choice of radio gossip on every station. She should have sent half of her earnings since she was getting half of my publicity. 

Seething, I lay on the couch, drowning in anger and self-pity.  Raina gave me a kiss and left me alone. The witching hour over, it was time for the cooling off period. She knew the routine well. I wanted one of Nana's green cigarettes, but  settled for wine and a bubble bath instead.

Bryce called twice. I let both attempts go to voicemail. Lillian called, the same. Roxy, Imani even Nana got the same treatment. I wasn't in the mood for a pep talk. Then, Hershey Kisses' pretty chocolate face filled my phone screen.

I smiled.

"Hey, Hershey."

"Hey, Abes. I saw your interview. You looked beautiful."

"Thank you." I leaned my head back onto the vinyl pillow and closed my eyes. "What are you doing up this late?"

"It's only ten o'clock, Abes and I'm a teenager, it's illegal for us to sleep."

I remembered those days.

"Well, I'm glad you called. I miss you."

"I miss you too. Hey, I gotta question."

"Uh oh." I laughed, but since she didn't like Rain Forest Barbie, the question had to be safe. "Shoot."

"Would it be okay if I go to a party tomorrow night, with Taylor?"

"That girl across the street?"

"Yes."

"Isn't she eighteen?"

"Yeah," Hershey mumbled.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Hershey."

"Aww, come on, Abes. I'm practically grown myself."

"Practically is not legally, and while you are in Austin, Texas you are legally my responsibility. So, the answer is no."

Her sucking teeth were working my nerves.