You wake up lying on a pillow drenched in your tears. Your face felt dry and itchy from all the crying, but you felt far too weak to get up and wash it. You lift your head slightly to look out the window, but it was still dark. Pitch black. You feel the bed next to you, and your stomach drops when you find it empty. Brian still wasn't back. He still hadn't forgiven you, and that's when you begin to sob again. God you had really fucked up. You had fucked up so bad.
"Y/N?" You hear a gentle voice whisper, and your ears prick up, immediately shutting up. You see a patch of darkness on the ground move and flip over so it was closer to you, you're a little bit scared, but when you see the silhouette of a head of curly hair your heart lights up.
"Brian..." you say, almost begging. like how a child asks for their toy.
"Are you crying again?" He asks, softly. You had never wanted to kiss him more.
"N-no... no I'm.... Yeah. I'm crying." You sob, gently laughing, but he doesn't laugh. You hear him shift a tiny bit closer and you want him to grab your hand. "Why are you on the ground?"
"I... I didn't know if you wanted me on the bed..." he says, a little defensive, a lot heart broken.
"Brian... I always want you here... that's why I was crying..."
"Because I wasn't sleeping next to you?" You nod your head but realise he probably can't see you.
"I love you so much..."
"Do you?" Your heart smashes. Even though you can't see his face, you could tell how cold it looked when he said that.
"Brian why would you say that?"
"Because... why... I just don't understand why you didn't tell me... when did it happen?" You hold your breath and think back to that night. The night you and Bran truly made love for the first time.
"Last Friday. When I was staying over, and you went out to the store. Roger came downstairs and... and started being really weird..."
"Did he touch you?" Brian asks, a little panicked. You smile, only because you know he can't see you.
"Only my cheek." Bri sighs. "He kissed me. And I pulled away, telling him I was in love with you and that would never change, but he kept saying how... how he couldn't stop thinking about me.. and..."
"Fucking prick."
"Brian..."
"Why are you defending him? Why did you defend him? Why didn't you just tell me straight away?"
"Because I love you Bri! And Roger is your best friend, and your band is going to fucking go places and it won't without Roger. I know you're going to be successful. You're going to be the most successful band the world had ever seen. But you know it as much as I do, that you need all four ingredients. You can't pull out Roger, or Brian. Especially not Brian." You sob, covering your face with your hands and sitting up out of bed. There's silence until you feel something on the bed. You look down and can barely see Brians hand, which is outstretched and reaching for yours. You chuckle slightly and grab his hand back firmly. Your small hand fitting like a glove inside of Brians.
"You were willing to suffer in silence, to let Roger keep coming onto you without me knowing about it, just so I could have a.. a chance at commercial success?" You bring his hand up to your face and hold it tight with both palms. You lightly kiss it, and place it up against your cheek.
"I know.. it was a stupid decision. I should have told you. I know I should have, and I'm so fucking sorry my love... I can't express to you how much I wanted to tell you... I hated it. I hated every second of it."
